Hamilton: An American Musical/Funny

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • In "The Story of Tonight (Reprise)":

Hamilton: I wish you’d brought this girl with you tonight, Burr.
Burr: You’re very kind, but I’m afraid it’s unlawful, sir.
Hamilton: What do you mean?
Burr: She's married.
Hamilton: I see—
Burr: She's married to a British officer.
Hamilton: Oh shit.

  • In "Take a Break", Phillip's rap, with her mother Eliza beatboxing:

My name is Philip, I am a poet
I wrote this poem just to show it
And I just turned nine
You can write rhymes, but you can’t write mine

  • In "Say No to This", when Hamilton reads a letter from Maria Reynolds' husband:

James Reynolds: Dear Sir, I hope this letter finds you in good health
And in a prosperous enough position to put wealth
In the pockets of people like me: down on their luck
You see, that was my wife who you decided to
Hamilton: Fuuuu—

  • In "Cabinet Battle #2":

Thomas Jefferson: When we were on death’s door, when we were needy
We made a promise, we signed a treaty
We needed money and guns and half a chance
Uh, who provided those funds?
James Madison: ..France.

  • In the end:

Jefferson: So quick-witted.
Hamilton: Alas, I admit it.
Jefferson: I bet you were quite a lawyer.
Hamilton: My defendants got acquitted.
Jefferson: Yeah. Well, someone oughta remind you.
Hamilton: What?
Jefferson: You're nothing without Washington behind you.
Washington: Hamilton!
Jefferson: Daddy’s calling!