Chainmail Bikini/Quotes

Aurora: The advent and popularity of these flashy pieces of (non)armor have set my mind to wonder: Why do people wear such armor? What sort of protection does it afford? Do the protected members contain regenerative qualities that will aid the rest of the body after it has been hacked to bits? What odd sports do these folk engage in that armored undergarments would aid them? Plagued for months by such questions, I at last found the answer to my question, as well as finding the maker and seller of such finery - Boom's Garden of Waterdeep.
Aurora: Though I cannot imagine doing battle in this constrictive and torturous device, many female warriors swear that the attractiveness produced by an armored corset often lets them avert combat altogether.

—Aurora's Whole Realms Catalogue

She wouldn't have a full uniform yet, not until someone had taken a, well, let's face it, a breastplate along to old Remitt the armourer and told him to beat it out really well here and here.

—Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms

Durkon: Tha's na leather armor! Leather armor be stiff an' boiled to deflect blows.

Merchant: Of course, men's leather armor. Women's leather armor amounts to any attractive outfit that has one or more leather items in it. I once sold one winsome young lass a leather headband that was more effective than plate."

—The Order of the Stick

(Indecent Invulnerability) - Bikinis render the wearer invulnerable to any form of damage.

—The Law of Anime #34: The Law of Probable Attire, 2nd Corollary

I won't require high-ranking female members of my organization to wear a stainless-steel bustier. Morale is better with a more casual dress-code. Similarly, outfits made entirely from black leather will be reserved for formal occasions.

—Evil Overlord List rule #33

Chuck: It's lingerie!
Marcus: It's +1 to AC and +2 to Charisma!
Chuck: It's ridiculous!

—Chainmail Bikini #5, discussing what Marcus' new character is wearing.

Because I've got my armor, which is really rather silly, on
(It's cut so low I feel like I'm the topless tow'rs of Ilion,
And isn't any use against attackers sagittarian).
I am the very model of a heroine barbarian!

—Xena, Heroine Barbarian

slowbeef: Yes, her "battlesuit".
Diabetus: Yes. Of course.
slowbeef: If anyone fires lasers at [her] breasts or vagina, it's fine.

—Retsupurae, mocking Dominique's choice of clothing in Space Adventure Cobra

Inside the trunk is a rather shocking article of, well, armor or something.
It appears to be a heavy bra made of hard glossy black leather, and lined with sharp pointed metal studs around its edges.
Although its use is not quite apparent, it does seem to have the "potential" for a certain kind of (*ahem*) appeal, if worn by the right person.
Still even more perplexing, along with the strange bra, buried in the bottom of the box you find a long black whip. Hmm, now what would these be doing in the Queen's boudoir?

—Wizardry 6, Queen's boudoir loot text

“The warhorn! My armor, QUICK!”
“Yes, Highness! HERE!”
“No, no, idiot, my FIGHTING armor! That’s my posing in bedchambers and going dancing armor! ”

— Ed Greenwood's simple solution for the Booblate Question in #epic fantasy

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