The Talk/Quotes

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


Oh, Papa, I know all about the stork. Mama told me about that years ago.

...No, wait a minute, Papa! Flower, seed, man, woman, bee, baby, small...

It isn't the stork, it isn't the stork, it isn't the stork at all!

Oh life is grand! It's very int'resting, I think I understand.

"Man to Man Talk," Once Upon a Mattress

Simba: So you're going to answer that question I asked you yesterday Dad?
Mufasa: Of course, son. Look, Simba. It starts with a girl lion and a boy lion. Now the boy lion takes his--
Simba: No, Dad. Not that question!
Mufasa: Oh, okay well then, smoking can be very addicting...
Simba: No! Not that one either!

Mufasa: Well, damn it! There's so damn many of those 'little talks' parents have to have with their kids these days. I mean if they aren't smokin' they're drinkin'. If they aren't drinkin' it's drugs. If they aren't doin' drugs it's that cheap-ass whore on the corner passing out herpes like they were toilet paper!
Well, son...baby geese come out of eggs... and don't ask me where the eggs come from, because--!
Mr. Ping, Kung Fu Panda 2

Carly: (jumps up from the couch) I am NOT having this discussion with you, Spencer!

Spencer: (jumps up and hugs her) THANK YOU SO MUCH!

"But there's some bits I don't get."
"Like what?"

"Like wot's fuckin' got to do wiv havin' babies?"