The Golden Girls/Awesome

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • Blanche's troubled grandson comes to visit. He misbehaves and treats everyone horribly. This all culminates with him blowing up and Sophia slapping him.
    • And then later, when Blanche realizes part of his problem is that his parents (her daughter and her "Yankee" husband) are always arguing, she calls them and tells them in a half-bluff/half-truth that she's keeping him. When her daughter argues this, Blanche says "All right, but if you don't start giving that boy the love and attention he deserves I will kick your uppity butt 'til Hell won't have it again!"
  • Dorothy has many, but one of this troper's favourites is her standing up to Blanche's abusive boyfriend, who is irritated that she isn't ready for a party:

Rex: You wanna go light a fire under her?
Dorothy: No, I don't think so.
Rex: Why not?
Dorothy: Because she's already getting burned enough as it is.
Rex: Look, would you just go tell Blanche to hurry up? I've gotta teach this woman what being on time means!
Dorothy: Wait a minute, I don't want you teaching her anything!
Rex: You know, you're starting to get on my nerves-
Dorothy: Good, because you're already on mine! I don't like the way you're treating Blanche. Under all that make-up and sexy talk, there's a little girl there, and for some reason or another she's letting you take advantage of her. I can't stop her from seeing you, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna hurry her up!

Rex: Who do you think you are?!

Dorothy: A friend!

  • Another of Dorothy's is in the second half of the two part episode Sick and Tired where she is diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. In the first episode, she goes all the way to New York to see a specialist, who merely tells her she 'is just getting old'. In the 2nd whilst out with the girls on a dinner celebrating the discovery of her illness, she discovers the doctor is dining with his wife in the restaurant as well. Instead of causing a ruckus, she calmly walks over and delivers to him one of the most AWESOME speeches in television history, letting him have it for giving her a poor diagnosis of just "getting old" and recommend that she see a psychiatrist before gently reminding her that one day, he'll be on the other side of the table like she was.

Dorothy: Because as angry as I am, and as angry as I always will be...I wish you a better doctor than you were to me.

    • A minor one goes to the doctor's wife, who immediately tells him to shut up when he tries to interrupt Dorothy.
  • Rose spent a whole episode fearing for her safety after a robbery, believing she can't defend herself. Once her nightmare is realized and she is chased down by a man, she knees him in the "safe deposit box". She proceeds to wail on him until he's left on the floor, writhing in plain. Needless to say, Rose learned she can defend herself.
    • Then, this becomes a Funny Moment immediately afterward because the guy she defended herself from was the parking attendant, who was trying to give back her keys.
  • The penultimate scene of the episode "Adult Education". Blanche, in order to earn a degree and get a promotion at the museum, goes back to school. She's failing one of her course, and asks her teacher for help. Instead, he offers her a passing grade in exchange for sex. After the dean fails to help her, Blanche buckles down, studying harder than she ever has. After she finishes her final exam, she finally tells her lecherous professor off.

Blanche: You know Prof. Cooper, I've thought a lot about what you said, and I have no intention of repeating this course.
Prof. Cooper: Good! I'm glad you decided to take me up on my offer.
Blanche: {scoffs} I'm declining your offer, Prof. Cooper, but I do want to thank you.
Prof. Cooper: For what?
Blanche: Well, thanks to you, I studied all day and all night, and whenever I felt like giving up, I thought about you and the kind of man you are, and I studied even harder. In fact you made me so mad that I decided to get an A on this test come hell or high-water! And I think I did. I, sir, am a lady. Maybe not the smartest lady in the world, but I do know that my self-respect is more important than passing your damn course. So you, sir, can kiss my A.

  • Rose getting her beloved teddy bear back from a bratty girl scout who was holding it for ransom.
  • In one flashback episode as the girls are reflecting on previous birthdays, Dorothy recalls a more recent birthday where Rose took her to a Chuck E. Cheese-esque restaurant, and had her entertained by an obnoxious clown called Mr. Ha Ha along with all the other kids celebrating birthdays. Dorothy was about to shove her cake in his face, when Mr. Ha Ha pointed out that's not very adult-like, and Mr. Ha Ha could sue. Then, one of the kids shoves his cake into the clown's face, and wishes Dorothy a happy birthday.
  • Barbara Weston faking out The Cheeseman when he kidnaps the girls and Miles by acting like she's unarmed, only to surprise him with a gun to his back when he's not looking. Followed immediately by a Crowning Moment of Funny too.

Rose: You said you didn't have a gun. You lied!
Barbara: ...to a bad guy. It's okay to lie to a bad guy.
Rose: Geez, there's so much that we as the public don't know!