Slices, Dices, and Makes Julienne Fries

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Here's a Stock Phrase born in the world of infomercials.

This trope is a must for the conscientious writer looking for a snappy, poppy way to jazz up the multiple talents of the object of his description.

You can put it at the end of a full list of other talents ("it's murderous, relentless, merciless, and makes julienne fries!") or when describing all other generic slicers and dicers (swords, battle axes, Japanese chefs, etc.) add "... and makes julienne fries" in a cute little wink.

A must for your Pop Culture Referencing Genies!

But wait, there's more! Choose this stock phrase now and we'll throw in "handles stubborn stains", "and still cut a tomato" for free!

The Trope Namer for this was commercials for the Veg-O-Matic, one of the first products Ron Popeil sold, which really could do all of the things mentioned in the title. For those of you who don't remember it, the Veg-O-Matic was basically a French-fry cutter, fitted with a second blade that could be turned 90 degrees to cut slices.

Examples:

Advertising

• According to this classic ad, Sonic the Hedgehog 2.

Animated Films

• The merchant/FramingDevice guy in Aladdin tried to sell such a device to the viewer: A combination hookah and coffee maker.

Merchant: Will not break! [bangs on table] Will not... [breaks] It broke.

Live Action Films

• In Explorers, the three kids meet aliens who pick up English from watching television. One did a better job than the other so the latter communicates by speaking out TV catch phrases and clips from old black-and-white TV recordings, including this one.
• In the first Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie, Michelangelo starts doing the "it slices, it dices" routine as Leonardo tosses a pizza in the air and slices it with his katanas — until a slice falls on Splinter's head.

Literature

• In Animorphs, the heroes have to cover for a broken-down Chee android named Erek(Chee are normally disguised with a hologram, but due to Yeerk tampering with the Pemalite ship that was the source of their technology, their holograms were failing) by pretending he's some kind of personal multifunction tool. Cassie gives a (nervous) sales pitch in front of a store audience.

"It slices. It dices. It can make Julie Ann's fries." "You mean julienne fries?" a woman asked skeptically. "Anyone's fries," Cassie said, her voice tinged with desperation.

Live Action TV

• Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode "Chosen"

Willow: Did you find out anything about the scythe? Buffy: It slices, dices and makes julienne preacher.

• Thank God You're Here Episode #1.3

Glenn Robbins: It slices, it dices. But wait, there's more. It also works as a... Ken? Frank Woodley: Killing thing.

• Hercules: The Legendary Journeys episode "The Academy"

Hercules: Let me guess: It slices and dices, and if you act now, you get a free butt-kicking. But wait, there's more!

Music

• The Weird Al Yankovic song "Mr. Popeil" references all of the classic infomercial lines, and this is no exception.
• Logan Whitehurst and "The Robot Cat."

It slices! It dices! It catches the mices! It's got a stock ticker with the Wall Street prices!

Video Games

• In the Warcraft III blademaster's funny quotes "I have a blade that can cut through armor! And still cut a tomato."
• From Ratchet and Clank Going Commando

Announcer:He slices, he dices and carves up a meandish, please welcome Chainblade.

• In the N Fuax Mercial of Crash Bandicoot Mind Over Mutant, this is one of the features of the NV.

Cortex: Talk to your disgusting friends! Watch pay-per-view! And Julien Fries! (Jams a potato in his ear, fries come out other ear. Takes a bite, and spits.) Oh, waxy!

• Oracle of Tao has a sword technique with this sort of thing (in the skill description text):

"Slices and dices! Only $14.99!"

Web Original

• SF Debris spoofed the line in his Projections review, when "kinoplasmic radiation" is used to justify or Hand Wave almost every plot development in this Star Trek Voyager episode.

SF Debris: What versatile radiation: it screws up all the computers, the transporters, and human brains. It slices, it dices, it cuts through a tin can and still slices through a tomato!

Western Animation

• In an early Veggie Tales story, the unnamed scallion was trying to sell a device called the "Forgive-O-Matic", which would cause God to forgive you of your sins. When informed that this wouldn't work, the scallion stated that you could put a potato into it and it would make julienne fries.
  • Which is rather horrifying in a world where vegetables are sapient, if you think about it.