Misaimed Marketing: Difference between revisions

[[File:slavojzizekforkids 4594.jpg|frame|They make great bedtime stories!<ref>...What? Just because ''your'' child is simple doesn't mean we have to dumb down education.</ref>]]

 

 

[[Executive Meddling|Executives]] are a superstitious, cowardly lot. They're always worrying about their "next big thing" gaining lots and lots of fans. And so when it comes to marketing and tie-in merchandise, they'll try to cast as wide a net as possible to attract a wide variety of people.

 

 

Toys based on R-rated films are common, though these are usually aimed at adults. However, such action figures [[What Do You Mean It's Not for Kids?|are also often found sold in mainstream toy stores]]. Some companies go even further, creating products directed ''at'' kids for those same movies. It's a tad creepy when either toys or [[Animated Adaptation|Saturday Morning Cartoons]] of movies that had visible sexual content are sold to kids. (Why, yes, your kids would '''love''' a ''[[Starship Troopers]]'' action figure...). It may also be because executives know that [[Periphery Demographic]] exists among kids who watch shows meant for older audiences.

 

Contrast [[Merchandise-Driven]], where marketing may have been the point all along. Tends to happen when you've got yourself a [[Cash Cow Franchise]]. Very often leads to [[What Do You Mean It's Not for Kids?]] See also [[Never Trust a Trailer]] and [[Contemptible Cover]]. Sometimes runs headlong into [[My Little Panzer]]...

 

{{examples|"How Toyetic Can you Get?"}}

* One of the biggest inspirations for this trope: the stuffed animals and PEZ dispensers (!?!) of nearly all the major nonhuman characters in ''[[His Dark Materials]]''. And that's not to mention the plastic toy Alethiometers given away at Burger King. These were all meant to promote ''[[The Golden Compass]]'' movie.

* Hasbro has an entire line of [[Fun Size|fun sized]] Marvel [[superhero]]es ("Super Hero Squad") and related lines for other franchises (almost all "____ Heroes", like ''[[Star Wars]]'' Galactic Heroes and ''[[Transformers]]'' Robot Heroes). Chibi [[Indiana Jones]] is a little strange, but [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yp0Gz866aPg Hulkie Pokey] (an [[Incredible Hulk]] toy who sings and dances in the same manner as [[Sesame Street|Tickle Me Elmo]]) is just nuts. The cute and cuddly ''[[The Punisher|Punisher]]'' is straight-up madness.

** And to complement the Hulkie Pokey, they have a SD Spider-Man plush that sings Eensy Weensy Spider and another with Spider-Man and his '''security web blanket''' as well.

* The ''[[Star Wars]] [[Transformers]]'' line. Had both Star Wars ''and'' Transformers toys been made by the same company in the '80s, they could have bankrupted their competition because of the sheer awesomeness of the combination. Seeing as how both have been around for nearly the same amount of time, it seems a bit forced.

* Another example of misaimed marketing in ''Transformers'' is the IDW comics original character [http://tfwiki.net/wiki/Drift Drift]. While more a [[Canon Sue|canon]]ized [[Gary Stu|fan-character]], the company has been playing him up, as they believe his Japan-centered drift racer car mode, red and white rising sun deco and dual [[Katanas Are Just Better|samurai swords]] will appeal to the fans, who've ended up finding his [[Creator's Pet]] [[Gary Stu]] Japan-shilling slightly insulting. That said, Drift's [[Merchandise-Driven|toy]] is pretty much agreed to be [[So Cool Its Awesome]] by the fans, even those who detest the character. On the other hand, the toy has been redecoed as Blurr, so Drift-haters can still experience the figure without actually owning a "Drift".

* [[J. K. Rowling]] rejected a lot of hypothetical ''[[Harry Potter]]'' merch. Her least favourite idea was the "Moaning Myrtle toilet seat". This mindset makes the existence of [http://www.toymania.com/columns/spotlight/hplevgame.shtml this "levitation skill game"] even more odd.

** How many ''Harry Potter'' fans actually wanted to know firsthand what an earwax-flavored Bertie Bott Bean tasted like anyway?

** [[Studio Gainax]] have a reputation for being absolute marketing ''whores'' and will sell pretty much any merchandise and sex up their characters as much as necessary. Including a Rei Ayanami soap dish.

** They still haven't made a Kaworu PEZ dispenser, which would be cool in a completely tasteless sort of way.

** Just to give you an idea of the horrors Gainax has unleashed here's [http://www.animenewsnetwork.cc/astro-toy/2009-01-25/with-rob-bricken/evangelion-aerocat-ex a review] of two catgirl figurines of Rei and Asuka which have generic anime faces, tiny underwear, and lovingly sculpted camel toes.

* This bit Warner Brothers in the butt something fierce when ''[[Batman Returns]]'' was released and turned out to be a significantly darker and more violent film than its predecessor. Complaints about kid-oriented tie-ins like McDonald's Happy Meals made it to at least one talk show, and [[Nickelodeon]] apparently canceled a contest where the winning kid would attend the London premiere. This outcry was one reason the [[Joel Schumacher]]-helmed films that followed wound up significantly [[Lighter and Softer]].

* The first ''[[Star Wars]]'' prequel was merchandised to hell and back. At the time, big box stores would have aisles where ''everything'' had a Star Wars character somewhere on the label—the Queen Amidala Galactic Body Wash and ''Learn Letter Sounds With Sebulba'' coloring book were especially hilarious. But [http://www.warpbreach.com/8/jarjarsuck.jpg this horrifying] [[Alien Scrappy|Jar Jar Binks]] Push Pop was certainly the lowest point. (See also the Parodies section below.)

** There's also something both disturbing and hilarious in the fact that there's an official Anakin Skywalker lightsaber toy that changes from blue to red with the push of a button, so kids can [[Face Heel Turn|switch from good to evil]] [[Jumping Off the Slippery Slope|just as easily as Anakin.]]

** Speaking of which, guess which character is the bona fide [[Series Mascot]], considering how heavily ''[[Star Wars]]'' is marketed to kids. No, it isn't adorable [[Robot Buddy]] R2-D2, nor is it little green lightsaber-wielding [[Badass Grandpa]] [[Muppet]] Yoda; it's [[The Dragon|Darth Vader]] himself, the genocidal, 7-foot-tall mentally unstable terrifying cyborg man who [[Bad Boss|kills his subordinates on a regular basis]] (along with countless children and Jedi) and [[Manipulative Bastard|invades cities to terrorize the inhabitants into carrying out his will and helping him take hostages]]. And yet, his sinister black helmet appears on everything from [http://www.mrbreakfast.com/ucp/344_4273_ucp.jpg cereal boxes] to [http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Star_Wars:_Friends_of_the_Force coloring books].

* A doll of a drunk Peter Griffin from ''[[Family Guy]]'' with a beer stain on his pants.

* A toyline tied in with the Alec Baldwin version of [[The Shadow]]. Yes, that film received a PG-13 (many feel doing so undermined the film), but the film still kept the Shadow as an outlaw who worked without police approval (Commissioner Wainright Barth mentions early in the film that he will order his subordinates to stop the Shadow from interfering in police business). The film also depicted the Shadow as a reformed opium warlord who had a rival slain even though doing so also slew one of his own loyal men.

* [http://x-entertainment.com/updates/2009/10/05/kind-and-gentle-freddy-krueger-toys/ The X-Entertainment blog]{{Dead link}} has an entry of two products based on ''[[A Nightmare on Elm Street]]:'' A Freddy stress doll and a Freddy yo-yo.

** Which can enter weird territory when you remember how Mega blocks is similar to legos, and the lego people had removable limbs. [[Ludicrous Gibs|This fits a little too well in a kid playset based on a violent FPS.]]

* There were McDonald's Happy Meals for [[James Cameron]]'s ''[[Avatar (film)|Avatar]]''. Translation: kids' meals tie-in toys for a PG-13 movie.

** See also [http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/81337 this animation].

* A ''Golgo13'' kewpie. [http://item.rakuten.co.jp/haco/r-4000070301/ A GODDAMN GOLGO 13 KEWPIE. A GOLGO, THE DEADLIEST ASSASSIN IN THE WORLD. KEWPIE.] Not that the Devilman and Sirene kewpies are any less insane, but c'mon.

* There was a toyline, comic book and freakin' CARTOON SERIES based around the raunchy R- to PG-rated ''[[Police Academy]]'' franchise of films.

* [[Hello Kitty]] [http://cgi.ebay.com/Sanrio-Hello-Kitty-Massager-Vibrator-Pink_W0QQitemZ360039770631QQcmdZViewItem Vibrator]. It's supposed to be just a Massager; Sanrio reportedly discontinued the item when they found out about people discovering the Perversion Potential. That doesn't stop the weirdness, though.

{{quote|"Now, ''[[Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves|Prince of Thieves]]'' is an EXCITING CEREAL!!!"}}

* Dear God, [[Barbie]]:

** [http://web.ecomplanet.com/USIM3087/ServerContent/MyCustomImages/USIM3087CustomImage2164879.jpg Star]{{Dead link}} [http://img.trekmovie.com/images/merchandise/barbie/Barbies2.jpg Trek] Barbies. In [[Red Shirt|red uniform]], of course.

** [https://web.archive.org/web/20120521111356/http://www.dollgenie.com/giftsets/1998-GS-X-Files.jpg X-Files] Barbies.

** When queried about this, author Chuck Palahniuk said, "They can do whatever they want with my book as long as the fucking check clears." He and David Fincher have talked about turning the movie into a musical, and were only about 50% joking when they did.

* The ''[[Pokémon]]'' bop bag. Perfect for those who hate Pokemon.

* A recent commercial for Mazda cars was a cross-promotion with... ''[[The Lorax (film)|The Lorax]]''. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vrvg33vkdFI&feature=player_embedded I shit you not.] This has already been a target for [[Internet Backdraft]] not just because of the blatant greenwashing in play, but also for the tragic irony of a car company promoting something that's absolutely ''famous'' for its [[Green Aesop]]. The commercial probably would have been less ridiculous if the car it was advertising was either electric or a hybrid (which works in context of the story), but this is a wholly gas-run car. [[Sarcasm Mode|Because we all associate that with being environmentally friendly.]]

** Yeah, there's around 70 companies that have marketing tie-ins with a film that preaches against consumerism.

* Back in the late 1990s-early 2000s, Disney sold a lighter with the main six from ''[[Recess]]'' on it. Granted, the show has a HUGE [[Periphery Demographic]], but it's still a piece of merchandise you wouldn't buy for the target audience.

* Here's a weird product from [[Thomas the Tank Engine]]: [http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/NTAwWDUwMA==/$(KGrHqFHJDcE63Z(jjCLBO3MQ932ug~~60_35.JPG A Thomas The Tank Engine Toddler Urinal.] Justified, since most kids who watch Thomas are toddlers, but still, how many parents use toddler urinals anyways?

 

== Parodies of this phenomenon ==

* Naturally, ''[[The Onion]]'' [https://web.archive.org/web/20100219002941/http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29418 satirized the hell out of this] with the headline:

{{quote|"80 Billion Tons Of Jar Jar Merchandise Now 70 Percent Off!"}}

** Mention of this episode, particularly the phrase "teddy bear," is [[Babylon 5/Funny|sufficient to make any fan of the series fall apart in a paroxysm of laughter]]. "[[Last-Second Word Swap|Cast... in a bad light]]," indeed.

** It's better than you think. The teddy bear used in the show was an actual gift to JMS. From [[Peter David]]. It later showed up on ''[[Space Cases]]'', with the cast wondering [[Thrown Out the Airlock|who would throw something like that away...]]

* [http://www.brandonbird.com/lno_color.html Law and Order: The Coloring Book]

* ''[[Schlock Mercenary]]'' brings us the Plasma Cannon Safety Coloring Book.

* ''[[Batman: The Animated Series]]'': After Selina Kyle (as Catwoman) helps Batman to foil a criminal plot, a friend tells her that she wouldn't be surprised if (in-universe) they started making Catwoman dolls. As if Catwoman is a heroic figure, when she's morally ambiguous at best.

* In ''[[The Legend of Korra]]'' "[[The Legend of Korra/Recap/B1/E05 The Spirit of Competition|The Spirit of Competition]]" the pro-bending announcer decides that the sight of Bolin throwing up a large quantity of noodles creates the perfect opportunity to advertise Flameo Noodles.

 

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