Fontes' Rants: Difference between revisions

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[http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com Fontes' Rants] is a webcomic which primarily illustrates things the author ([[Captain Obvious|Fontes]]) finds strange, funny, stupid, or downright infuriating in popular works of anime, comic books and video games, and even things he finds on [[Deviant ART]]. It also has cheap laughs from time to time.
[https://web.archive.org/web/20131031095534/http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/ Fontes' Rants] is a webcomic which primarily illustrates things the author ([[Captain Obvious|Fontes]]) finds strange, funny, stupid, or downright infuriating in popular works of anime, comic books and video games, and even things he finds on [[Deviant ART]]. It also has cheap laughs from time to time.


Recurring original characters include [[Author Avatar|Fontes himself]], an unnamed [[Fan Girl|fangirl]], [[Team Pet|Tanooki the raccoon]], Fontes' friend Steven Worker, and Takeshi, Fontes' "son" by the [[Death Note (Manga)|Life Note]].
Recurring original characters include [[Author Avatar|Fontes himself]], an unnamed [[Fan Girl|fangirl]], [[Team Pet|Tanooki the raccoon]], Fontes' friend Steven Worker, and Takeshi, Fontes' "son" by the [[Death Note|Life Note]].


{{tropelist}}
----


* [[Ascended Extra]]: Luigi knocked out the Playstation Network with a [[Death Note]], gave Sony the idea for a rear touchpad, and kicked [[Batman]] off a building.
=== This work provides examples of: ===
* [[Ass Shove]]: Ever wonder [https://web.archive.org/web/20131001081045/http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1395917/booting-up-the-booty/ how TMs work] in [[Pokémon]]?

* [[Author Avatar]]: Fontes appears in the comic with characters such as [[Kingdom Hearts (video game)|Sora]], [[Naruto]], and [[X-Men (Comic Book)|Wolverine]].
* [[Ascended Extra]]: Luigi knocked out the Playstation Network with a [[Death Note (Manga)|Death Note]], gave Sony the idea for a rear touchpad, and kicked [[Batman]] off a building.
* [[Ass Shove]]: Ever wonder [http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1395917/booting-up-the-booty/ how TMs work] in [[Pokémon]]?
* [[Author Avatar]]: Fontes appears in the comic with characters such as [[Kingdom Hearts (Video Game)|Sora]], [[Naruto]], and [[X Men (Comic Book)|Wolverine]].
* [[Badass Normal]]: Who climbs faster?
* [[Badass Normal]]: Who climbs faster?
{{quote| '''[[Spider Man]]''': 'Tha hell? Did ya took the elevator, or something?!<br />
{{quote|'''[[Spider-Man]]''': 'Tha hell? Did ya took the elevator, or something?!
'''[[Assassin's Creed|Ezio]]''': Silenzio, ragno! You now owe me fifty dollars. }}
'''[[Assassin's Creed|Ezio]]''': Silenzio, ragno! You now owe me fifty dollars. }}
* [[Breaking the Fourth Wall]]: Occasionally, but one comic was just Fontes looking at the reader, pointing down, saying "keep scrolling down". Turns out, he actually puts a [[Exactly What It Says On the Tin|rant]] under most of the comics, and apparently not many noticed.
* [[Breaking the Fourth Wall]]: Occasionally, but one comic was just Fontes looking at the reader, pointing down, saying "keep scrolling down". Turns out, he actually puts a [[Exactly What It Says on the Tin|rant]] under most of the comics, and apparently not many noticed.
* [[Combat Pragmatist]]: In one of Fontes' many [[Final Fantasy]] parodies. On the left, a [[Black Mage]]. On the right, a [[White Mage]] and a Fighter. The black mage starts to cast [[Kill It With Fire|Firaga]], when the white mage unloads a shotgun into his face.
* [[Combat Pragmatist]]: In one of Fontes' many [[Final Fantasy]] parodies. On the left, a [[Black Mage]]. On the right, a [[White Mage]] and a Fighter. The black mage starts to cast [[Kill It with Fire|Firaga]], when the white mage unloads a shotgun into his face.
{{quote| '''Fighter''': Ehm... dude, it was his turn.<br />
{{quote|'''Fighter''': Ehm... dude, it was his turn.
'''[[The Reveal|Fontes]]''': I don't [[Precision F Strike|fuckin']] care!!! }}
'''[[The Reveal|Fontes]]''': I don't [[Precision F-Strike|fuckin']] care!!! }}
** Also, using the [[Super Strength|golden gauntlets]] to throw a one ton obelisk at [[Ocarina of Time|Ganondorf's]] head.
** Also, using the [[Super Strength|golden gauntlets]] to throw a one ton obelisk at [[Ocarina of Time|Ganondorf's]] head.
* [[Concealment Equals Cover]]: [[Subverted]]; Fontes avoids Takeshi's gunfire by hiding behind a chair, then notes that Takeshi's guns only shoot "heavily compressed air".
* [[Concealment Equals Cover]]: [[Subverted]]; Fontes avoids Takeshi's gunfire by hiding behind a chair, then notes that Takeshi's guns only shoot "heavily compressed air".
* [[Cool vs. Awesome]]: [[F Zero|Captain Falcon]] and [[Chuck Norris]] as [[Pokémon]] trainers.
* [[Cool vs. Awesome]]: [[F-Zero|Captain Falcon]] and [[Chuck Norris]] as [[Pokémon]] trainers.
{{quote| Hitmonchan uses "Falcon Punch"!<br />
{{quote|Hitmonchan uses "Falcon Punch"!
Hitmonlee uses "Roundhouse Kick"! }}
Hitmonlee uses "Roundhouse Kick"! }}
* [[Didn't Think This Through]]: Fontes decided to use the [[Death Note (Manga)|Life Note]] to create an [[Ax Crazy]] [[Marty Stu]] character. One broken nose and bout of unconsciousness later;
* [[Didn't Think This Through]]: Fontes decided to use the [[Death Note|Life Note]] to create an [[Ax Crazy]] [[Marty Stu]] character. One broken nose and bout of unconsciousness later;
{{quote| '''Fontes''': ...I really shouldn't have made him able to summon firearms...}}
{{quote|'''Fontes''': ...I really shouldn't have made him able to summon firearms...}}
* [[Disproportionate Retribution]]: Fontes used the Life Note to create [[Pokémon (Anime)|Ash Ketchum]] to catch Takeshi, but also used it to make Ash's blood turn to acid afterwards for a slow, agonizing death.
* [[Disproportionate Retribution]]: Fontes used the Life Note to create [[Pokémon (anime)|Ash Ketchum]] to catch Takeshi, but also used it to make Ash's blood turn to acid afterwards for a slow, agonizing death.
{{quote| '''Fontes:''' ...I really hate him for leaving Charizard behind!}}
{{quote|'''Fontes:''' ...I really hate him for leaving Charizard behind!}}
* [[Does This Remind You of Anything]]:
* [[Does This Remind You of Anything?]]:
{{quote| '''[[Super Mario Galaxy|Luma]]''': Oh, yeah, gimme those starbits! I can't hold it any longer!!!}}
{{quote|'''[[Super Mario Galaxy|Luma]]''': Oh, yeah, gimme those starbits! I can't hold it any longer!!!}}
* [[Fan Girl]]: No name given (yet), she was in the very first strip obsessing over [[Inuyasha]].
* [[Fan Girl]]: No name given (yet), she was in the very first strip obsessing over [[Inuyasha]].
* [[Good Old Fisticuffs]]: Fontes [http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1440114/the-right-weapon-for-the-job/ plays] [[Skyrim]].
* [[Good Old Fisticuffs]]: Fontes [https://web.archive.org/web/20131001081051/http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1440114/the-right-weapon-for-the-job/ plays] [[Skyrim]].
* [[Highly Visible Ninja]]:
* [[Highly-Visible Ninja]]:
{{quote| '''Mook''': Stop at once!<br />
{{quote|'''Mook''': Stop at once!
'''[[Naruto]]''': Hell no! [[Verbal Tic|Bahleeeve it]]!<br />
'''[[Naruto]]''': Hell no! [[Verbal Tic|Bahleeeve it]]!
'''[[Metal Gear Solid|Nearby "Box"]]''': *sigh* ...Rookies... }}
'''[[Metal Gear Solid|Nearby "Box"]]''': *sigh* ...Rookies... }}
* [[Hypocritical Humor]]:
* [[Hypocritical Humor]]:
{{quote| '''[[Guilty Gear|Bridget]]''': You look like a queer, ya know?}}
{{quote|'''[[Guilty Gear|Bridget]]''': You look like a queer, ya know?}}
* [[I'm a Humanitarian]]: [[Skyrim]] [http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1452619/tastes-like-chicken/ again].
* [[I'm a Humanitarian]]: [[Skyrim]] [https://web.archive.org/web/20130801201913/http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1452619/tastes-like-chicken/ again].
* [[Improbable Weapon User]]:
* [[Improbable Weapon User]]:
{{quote| '''[[Kingdom Hearts|Sora]]''': What?! What's so funny?!<br />
{{quote|'''[[Kingdom Hearts|Sora]]''': What?! What's so funny?!
'''Fontes''': Just look at that thing!!!<br />
'''Fontes''': Just look at that thing!!!
'''Sora''': ...? ...Aww, [[Precision F Strike|fuck]] you, [[Square Enix|Square]]!!! }}
'''Sora''': ...? ...Aww, [[Precision F-Strike|fuck]] you, [[Square Enix|Square]]!!! }}
* [[Lampshading]]: Probably the main theme of the comic, actually.
* [[Lampshading]]: Probably the main theme of the comic, actually.
* [[Mundane Utility]]: "[http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1297871/colgate-who-needs-that/ Dai Gurren Dental Care]". Yes.
* [[Mundane Utility]]: "[https://web.archive.org/web/20140715045918/http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1297871/colgate-who-needs-that/ Dai Gurren Dental Care]". Yes.
* [[Power Glows]], but may not be safe to [http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1330068/the-dark-side-of-the-shins-part-ii/ use as a flashlight.]
* [[Power Glows]], but may not be safe to [https://web.archive.org/web/20120719055515/http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1330068/the-dark-side-of-the-shins-part-ii/ use as a flashlight.]
* [[The Power of Creation]]: The Life Note grants this to whoever uses it.
* [[The Power of Creation]]: The Life Note grants this to whoever uses it.
* [[Stylistic Suck]]: How do you make fun of a [[Wii U|gaming console with a stupid name]]? With an [http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1216388/dumbest-strip-ever/ equally stupid comic strip.]
* [[Stylistic Suck]]: How do you make fun of a [[Wii U|gaming console with a stupid name]]? With an [https://web.archive.org/web/20120630112005/http://fontesrants.smackjeeves.com/comics/1216388/dumbest-strip-ever/ equally stupid comic strip.]
* [[Team Pet]]: Tanooki.
* [[Team Pet]]: Tanooki.


{{reflist}}
{{reflist}}
[[Category:Meta Webcomics]]
[[Category:Meta Webcomics]]
[[Category:Fontes Rants]]
[[Category:Fontes' Rants]]
[[Category:Webcomic]]
[[Category:Web Comics]]

Latest revision as of 07:50, 21 May 2021

Fontes' Rants is a webcomic which primarily illustrates things the author (Fontes) finds strange, funny, stupid, or downright infuriating in popular works of anime, comic books and video games, and even things he finds on Deviant ART. It also has cheap laughs from time to time.

Recurring original characters include Fontes himself, an unnamed fangirl, Tanooki the raccoon, Fontes' friend Steven Worker, and Takeshi, Fontes' "son" by the Life Note.

Tropes used in Fontes' Rants include:


Spider-Man: 'Tha hell? Did ya took the elevator, or something?!
Ezio: Silenzio, ragno! You now owe me fifty dollars.

  • Breaking the Fourth Wall: Occasionally, but one comic was just Fontes looking at the reader, pointing down, saying "keep scrolling down". Turns out, he actually puts a rant under most of the comics, and apparently not many noticed.
  • Combat Pragmatist: In one of Fontes' many Final Fantasy parodies. On the left, a Black Mage. On the right, a White Mage and a Fighter. The black mage starts to cast Firaga, when the white mage unloads a shotgun into his face.

Fighter: Ehm... dude, it was his turn.
Fontes: I don't fuckin' care!!!

Hitmonchan uses "Falcon Punch"!
Hitmonlee uses "Roundhouse Kick"!

Fontes: ...I really shouldn't have made him able to summon firearms...

Fontes: ...I really hate him for leaving Charizard behind!

Luma: Oh, yeah, gimme those starbits! I can't hold it any longer!!!

Mook: Stop at once!
Naruto: Hell no! Bahleeeve it!
Nearby "Box": *sigh* ...Rookies...

Bridget: You look like a queer, ya know?

Sora: What?! What's so funny?!
Fontes: Just look at that thing!!!
Sora: ...? ...Aww, fuck you, Square!!!