Maskerade/Awesome

Everything About Fiction You Never Wanted to Know.


  • When, after Granny Weatherwax wins at poker against Death, He asks Granny what would have happened if she lost:

I have to know. What would have happened if I had not...lost?
'At the cards, you mean?'
Yes. What would you have done?
Granny laid the baby down carefully on the straw, and smiled.
'Well,' she said, 'for a start... I'd have broken your bloody arm.'

    • Every one of Granny's actions in that scene qualifies, from blowing out a candle to performing chiropractic.
    • Death gets one too in that same scene. Granny challenges Death to a game of cards for the life of a child, and it's implied she cheats and deals herself the winning hand. But Death makes them switch hands before turning them over. Granny has four queens...and Death complains that he's lost, since all he has are "four ones"...
  • Granny is made of Awesome but come on, folks, we all know Death deliberately lost that game.
    • The implication is that he, Death, lost on purpose because he was afraid of what Granny would do to him if she lost.
    • Or possibly that Death, who must follow the rules, at least has enough sympathy to bend them.
  • Granny getting Nanny her rightful proceeds from her "cookbook."
  • Nanny saving the chandelier, and dealing with the Ghost by faking a heart attack. "Watch out!"
  • Granny's Barehanded Blade Block followed by a "The Reason You Suck" Speech.

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