The Tough Guide to Fantasyland

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This piece of Meta Fiction by Diana Wynne Jones pretends that all of the fantasy stories ever told took place in a real place called "Fantasyland", and that the creators of the stories are the "Management" who arrange for the audience to go on "tours". With this setup the list of fantasy tropes is presented as if to a tourist visiting another country and thoroughly deconstructed. It also pretends that the stories are statistically representative of Fantasyland, and thus concludes that the most common type of meal is stew, that cities are composed mainly of alleyways, and that the ecology and economy of Fantasyland are severely screwed up.

Wynne Jones later wrote a novel called The Dark Lord of Derkholm set in the Fantasyland described in the Tough Guide and deconstructing it further by revealing it's really nothing like the guidebook at all and it's all put on (very reluctantly) for the benefit of the tourists.

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Among the tropes included (and, pretty much to a one, subverted and lampshaded) are:

• Arabian Nights Days: The "Fanatic Caliphates" setting
• Aristocrats Are Evil: A primary feature of the land of the Aristocratic Feudalists.
• Assassin Outclassin': This is the topic of the entry on Assassins - that the tourist is attacked in an inn by a supposedly expert Assassin but manages to overpower and kill them, and the Assassin goes to his death complaining about the Tourist breaking the rules.
• Automaton Horses: The Tough Guide speculates that in Fantasyland horses may be a type of vegetable.
• Beauty Equals Goodness / Color Coded for Your Convenience / Exclusively Evil: She pretty much comments on every form of Unfortunate Implications found in "Tolkienesque" fantasy
• Better Than a Bare Bulb: The book was written to lampshade.
• Bishonen: The "gay mage" tour companion.
• The Blacksmith: A good source of allies
• Born in the Saddle: The Anglo-Saxon Cossack barbarians.
• Burn the Witch: A common hazard (along with crucifixion) when dealing with Religious Feudalists.
• But Not Too White: Character's goodness can be judged by their tans.
• Color Coded for Your Convenience
• Corrupt Church: The land of the Religious Feudalists are ruled by one of these.
• Crystal Dragon Jesus: The One God variety of Religion, if a male god is used. Even if his worshippers see him as benign, they tend to hate women and magic users (and witches, who are frequently both) and fall into Knight Templar territory at their very worst.
• Damsel in Distress: Entry number one on Princesses consists of one word - "Wimps."
• Dragon Rider
• Droit Du Seigneur: Mentioned by name as one of the things that bad Aristocratic Feudalists get up to when oppressing the peasantry.
• Evil Chancellor
• Evil Smells Bad: The "Reek of Wrongness."
• Encyclopedia Exposita
• Evil Matriarch: The "bad mother" variety of bad queen.
• Fantasy Counterpart Culture: A whole bunch of them.
• Fantasy World Map
  • Take a look at the map upside down.
• Forgotten Trope: The entries tend to draw from cliches of Strictly Formula commercial fantasy as well as some instances likely directed at particular works. So, while a lot of the tropes it cites are still frequently used, others aren't so much.
• Galley Slave: The only reason that galleys seem to exist in Fantasyland. If a male character is enslaved, chances are he'll probably wind up chained to an oar as one of these.
• Giant Flyer
• Gladiator Games: The other common fate of male characters who get enslaved.
  • Gladiator Revolt: How such characters get free.
• God Save Us From the Queen: The "old fashioned bad" variety of bad queen.
• Gods Need Prayer Badly: One of the two absolute Rules in regards to religion in Fantasyland.
• Heroes Want Redheads: Princesses who fall for the hero are often redheads in Fantasyland.
• I Know Your True Name: Using Punctuation Shaker names is used as a form of protection against this.
• Lampshade Hanging
• Left Justified Fantasy Map
• Made a Slave
• A Man Is Not a Virgin
• More Predators Than Prey
• No Periods, Period
• Older Than They Think: The book, in both its concept and style, is awfully similar to this very wiki.
• Punctuation Shaker
• Rebellious Princess: Entry number two on Princesses.
• Red Shirt/Mauve Shirt: The Serious Soldier.
• Rescue Sex: The entry on slavery mentions beautiful female variety of slave and how they are rescued from sexual slavery by a Conanesque male character, who is rewarded with no-holds-barred sex, and then abandons them in the middle of nowhere.
• Shout-Out: "[Cursed rings] must be returned from whence they came, preferably at over a thousand degrees Fahrenheit, and the curse means you won't want to do this." Among others.
• Tarot Motifs
• Turncoat: Which is only people who turn against you. People who come over to your side are only doing what is right. Notable in that coats do not exist in Fantasyland, but turncoats do.
• Vain Sorceress
• Vestigial Empire: The Trope Namer, even.
• Virgin Sacrifice: The preferred form of Sacrifice among evil religions, which features ritual rape as part of the ceremony.
• Virginity Makes You Stupid
• When Trees Attack
• Weird Trade Union: She questions if the assassins' and thieves' guild are the only ones existing in Fantasyland.