Pre-Ass-Kicking One-Liner: Difference between revisions

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{{quote|''"This is [[The Nineties|the '90s]]. You don't just go around punching people. [[Lampshade Hanging|You have to say something cool first]]."''|'''Joe Hallenbeck''', ''The Last Boy Scout''}}

** Ichigo after Orihime cries out for him not to die. He [[Barehanded Blade Block|grabs the blade]] and... "Sorry, Grimmjow. Looks like I can't let you hurt me anymore." *SLASH*

** Rangiku after Izuru has rendered her sword unusable. "So what if I can't hold my weapon to use it? I just won't hold it. She then proceeds to unleash her shikai and own Izuru with it.

** "That was a practice swing."

* In ''[[Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann (Anime)|Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann]]'', every hero in the show, at one point or another, gets to yell some variation of "WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM!!"

'''Edward:''' You know what? You're not the only one who can't stand doubters, Preach'. [[Badass Boast|Here's the REAL hammer of God!]] }}

** This scene was, unfortunately, subjected to a lot of narm in ''Brotherhood,'' primarily in terms of animation. Worst of all, though, is that Ed's [[Badass Boast]] was changed to a simple, "You want it? You got it!" Combine this with it being changed from the big dethroning moment where Cornello's power is outdone in front of his followers to an ordinary fight scene, and this is pretty big disappointment.

** Jacuzzi in the anime, right before his [[Traintop Battle|traintop]] beatdown of Goose: "I have a gun...''in my heart!''"

* The hot-headed Kirie "Jump-to-conclusions" Kojima of ''[[Girls Bravo (Manga)|Girls Bravo]]'' also does this often anytime she sees the protagonist Yukinari in a hard-to-explain situation.

* ''[[Incredible Hulk (Comic Book)|Incredible Hulk]]'': "You're making me angry. You won't like me when I'm angry."

** [[Hulk Speak]] [[Unstoppable Rage|SMASH]]!

* Jesse from ''[[Preacher (Comic Book)]]'' gets a good one before [[Roaring Rampage of Revenge|going nuclear]] [[Curb Stomp Battle|on a group of murderous fanatics]]:

{{quote| I owe you pissant white trash cocksucking sons of bitches all the hurt in the fuckin' world. So who wants to get his ass kicked first?}}

* ''[[Star Trek First Contact (Film)|Star Trek First Contact]]'': Worf - "Assimilate this"

** Alternatively, Data's "Resistance. Is. Futile."

* ''[[Last Action Hero (Film)|Last Action Hero]]'' (Before kicking a police officer in the groin):

{{quote| '''Jack Slater:''' You want to be a farmer? Here's a couple of achers!}}

** [[Punctuated for Emphasis|THIS! IS! SPARTA!]]

** And some other pretty awesome quotes: "Give them nothing! But take from them, everything!", "This is where we hold them! This is where we fight! This is where they die! Remember this day, men, for it will be yours for all time.", "Spartans! Ready your breakfast and eat hearty, FOR TONIGHT, WE DINE IN HELL!!!", "No retreat, no surrender. That is Spartan law. And by Spartan law, we will stand and fight...and die. [[Politically-Correct History|A new age has begun: an age of freedom]]! And all will know that 300 Spartans gave their last breath to defend it!", "Spartans! Prepare for glory! ", "Persians! Come and get them!" (in response to an appeal to lay down their weapons),"We're in for one wild night.", "Spartans! Push!" Needless to say, ''[[300 (Film)|Three Hundred]]'' was full of ridiculously awesome lines. If you saw only [[Ho Yay]] on the last two, my work here is done.

***** The Spartans didn't get their asses kicked at Thermopylae. True they lost, but they did NOT get their asses kicked.

* ''[[Straw Dogs (Film)|Straw Dogs]]''. "OKAY! You've had your fun! And if you don't clear out now... there'll be real trouble. I mean it." Another example is "This is where I live. This is me. I will not allow violence against this house."

** Also, as delivered by the [[Final Girl]]: [[Crowning Moment of Awesome|Welcome to my world,]] [[This Is for Emphasis, Bitch|bitch!]]

* ''[[A Clockwork Orange (Film)|A Clockwork Orange]]'': "Ho ho ho! Well if it isn't fat, stinking, billygoat Billyboy in poison! How art thou, thou globby bottle of cheap, stinking chip oil? Come and get one in the yarbles -- if ya have any yarbles, ya eunuch jelly, thou!"

{{quote| '''Guile:''' I'm the Repo Man... and you're out of business.<br />

'''Guile:''' This is the collection agency, Bison! Your ass is six month overdue... and it's mine! }}

'''Nicholas:''' There was a bit earlier on that you missed, where I distracted him with a cuddly monkey, then I said "Playtime's over!" and hit him with the peace lily.<br />

'''Danny:''' ''(delighted)'' You're off the fuckin' chain! }}

* ''[[Gran Torino]]'': [[Clint Eastwood]]'s character has a ton of amazing [[One-Liner|one liners]], but some of the best Pre-Asskicking One-Liners are, "Ever notice how you come across somebody once in a while you shouldn't have fucked with? That's me." and "Yea? I blow a hole in your face and then I go in the house... and I sleep like a baby. You can count on that. We used to stack fucks like you five feet high in Korea... use you for sandbags."

** "''Get off my lawn''".

** In the episode "Anne", Buffy has run away from home and changed her name to Anne (her middle name). In the course of the episode, she finds herself trapped in a demonic dimension where humans are made into slave labor. One of the demons is trying to break the humans' spirit by asking them "Who are you" and hitting them if they answer anything but "No one". What does Buffy answers, just before kicking everyone's ass?

{{quote| '''Buffy:''' I'm Buffy, the Vampire Slayer. And you are?.}}

** [[Break the Cutie|Dark/Royally Pissed Off]] Willow is actually quite adept at badass one-liners. Standouts include [[Punctuated for Emphasis|I. OWE. YOU. PAIN.]] and "Bag of tricks?" "Bag of ''knives'' ".

** Which brings us to the most cold-blooded pre-killing line of all time: "Bored now." Which was made more poignant by the fact that it was [[Lesbian Vampire|Vampire Willow's]] catchphrase, last heard 3 years before.

** "I'VE GOT A SAYING, FEEL THIS!"

** "Would you like me to repeat the question?" (more post-asskicking, but still awesome.) Before that moment, there was this. "<big> Where. Is. My. Wife. </big>" By the same guy: "Heil!"

{{quote| '''Gene:''' Today, my friend, your diary entry will read "Took a prozzie hostage and was shot by three armed ''bastards''."}}

** Which was based on his original, fondly remembered "You are surrounded by armed BASTARDS!" Gene get's a ton of these.

'''Ziggy:''' Yeah, and if you wake the baby, I might just have to sing you all a sweet little lullaby, and then tuck you into bed without any dessert, or even a single goodnight kiss... ''(notices Scott staring at him)'' Oh, wait, wait, what am I even saying. That... that didn't even make sense. I'm really sorry, um... kinda new at being a Power Ranger. I'm, I'm still working on my, uh... my hero one-liners, so... <br />

'''Scott:''' Look, Zig. I told you. They're called 'one-liners' for a reason. We're action heroes. When it comes to talking -- ''(Scott takes out three Grinders with a Capoiera kick)'' -- less is more. }}

* [[Stargate SG-1 (TV)|SG1's]] Jack O'Neill and [[Stargate Atlantis (TV)|Atlantis's]] John Sheppard, both of whom are masters of this trope, with too many examples to mention. And the rest of their teams are no slouches either.

* From ''Enos'': A cop pops out of hiding and pulls a gun on two thugs, saying, "Your tax dollars at work."

 

== Theater ==

** Macbeth: "Lay on, Macduff, and damn'd be him who first cries, 'Hold! Enough!'"

** Henry V, "God for Harry! England and Saint George!"

** Emily Wong got one in a Twitter feed. She was in an aircar, unarmed, bleeding, with a Reaper right in front of her. She had only one choice. Her last message: "You want to see how a human dies? [[Crowning Moment of Awesome|At ramming speed.]]" A shame she almost certainly accomplished nothing with it.

* Every [[Fighting Game]] you can find these days.

** [[Final Fantasy X (Video Game)|"Your hope ends here! And your miserable existence with it!"]]

** ''[[Final Fantasy X (Video Game)|Final Fantasy X]]'' in general has the characters say one-liners before casting spells and using skills. [[Deadpan Snarker|Lulu]] is particularly known for that.

* Just before fighting O'Malley in ''[[Red vs. Blue (Machinima)|Red vs. Blue]]'', Church rattles off a number of these lines such as: "You're just one big headache, and I've got a whole pistol full of aspirin!" and: "I've got half a mind to kill you! And the other half agrees!"

** With Tex snarking in the background. Even though those are clever, they're very corny.

** At the end of season 1, Donut, before killing Tex at super-long-range with a plasma grenade: "HEY, BITCH! REMEMBER ME? I SAVED SOMETHING FOR YA!"

** "Okay, so who's first?" The next episode is a 7-minute episode of her absolutely [[Curb Stomp Battle|demolishing]] Sarge, Grif, Simmons, and Tucker at the same time, [[Badass|without even breaking a sweat.]] Also they're all armed and she's not. It doesn't matter.

** Mitzi McNinja gets one of her own during the "Punch Dracula" [[Story Arc]]: "And the dead can't hear their own eulogies. So let's wrap this up.!"

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* In ''[[The Order of the Stick (Webcomic)|The Order of the Stick]]'', Elan actually ''needs'' to use these for an attack bonus on his "Dashing Swordsman" prestige class.

** And then there's Bozzok's "Yeah, and I'm bringing the onions -- [[Narm|to make you cry]]!"

* ''[[Clone High (Animation)|Clone High]]'': "More tea, Wesley?"

** "Bah! Chamomile!"

** Rainbow Dash, when she's about to start rounding out the parasprites in "Swarm of the Century":

{{quote| "Time to take out the adorable trash."}}

'''Others:''' Pay-back time! }}

* ''[[Scooby Doo Mystery Incorporated (Animation)|Scooby Doo Mystery Incorporated]]''

{{quote| '''Scooby Doo''': ''Bad Dog.'' Time to heel. }}

** He followed it up with something even more bad ass, especially given his utterly cold delivery.

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