Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey/Funny

Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey
"Chance: I'll give him the old puppy-eyed look. (whimpering)

Chef: Sorry fella, it's not for dogs. (some meatballs fall off the table)

Chance: Flying meat! (eating the meatballs) Ahh! Hot! Hot!"

""Must be someone new. I never forget a face.""
 * Chance sniffing the fat chef's butt (including closeup).

"Chance: Hallelujah, I've died and gone to Kentucky!
 * Chance chasing chickens:

Later...

Chance: Hey, which one of you are regular and which ones are extra crispy?"

"Chance: Hey hey, come on, I'm not gonna hurt you I just wanna chew on your neck."
 * He also chased a cornered duck.

"Chance: Oh, don't let him eat me! I swear I'll never eat a McNugget again!"
 * He later gets chased off by a turkey, unsure of what it is.

"(wings flapping, Chance raises his head)
 * While sleeping in the forest.

Shadow: (annoyed) Now what?

Chance: (voice shaking) There's something out there.

Sassy: (trying to scare Chance) Ooooooooooooohhhh!

Shadow: Enough Sassy! Now sleep!"

"Chance: Hey! Remember hot dogs?
 * At one point in the movie, the dog playing Chance charges face-first into a sapling at full throttle and then just keeps on running. This event was clearly accidental, but the sheer spontaneity and reality of it is what makes it so hilarious; it wouldn't have been nearly as funny if it had been planned in advannce with a CG dog.
 * And this gem:

Shadow: Oh yeah, never much cared for the name though...

Chance: Well... I didn't think they were made of actual dogs...

Shadow: I didn't think they were made of actual meat."

"Chance: I'm such a wimp! I'm running from a cat!
 * While trying to escape a cougar:

Shadow: I won't tell if you won't!

Chance: 'Course, this is no ordinary housecat. This is, like, Arnold Schwarzenkitty!"

"Guard: Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty.
 * This too:

Sassy: "Here kitty kitty kitty." Not in your life, chubby.

Guard: Here kitty kittty. Here, kitty. SCAT! Here, kitty kitty kitty.

Sassy: No, dummy dummy dummy dummy.

Guard: [walking away] Stupid cat!

Sassy: Hmmm! What a bozo."

"Sassy: Alright, this way, Thunder Butt!"
 * Later, when Sassy gets him to chase her:

"Chance: Okay, okay, I'll talk! I left a gift on the carpet. I let Sassy take the heat for when I unrolled the toilet paper all over the house. I stole underwear on three occasions! [the vet yanks a quill out of his face] Okay, okay, four, four!"
 * Chance's confession.

Homeward Bound II: Lost in San Francisco
"Shadow: [about Chance] You know you miss him.

Sassy: Okay, fine! I miss his stupid jokes, and his stupid face, and his stupid... stupidness!

Shadow: Oh, Sassy, stop it.

Sassy: And I'm stupidly starting to worry about him!"

"Riley: Enough! Bando, knock it off!
 * Also, after Chance and Bando (Delilah's wannabe boyfriend) argue over her:

Bando: (humbly) Sorry, Riley. I wasn't trying to start nothing. I'm done. I'm done. (under his breath) Stupid lost dog, trying to steal my woman. Homewrecker!"

"Chance: Uh guys, they're big, they're huge, they're coming to get me!"
 * Chance terrified of the shadows in the alley.