Noodle Implements/Quotes

""The stuff that was going on was pretty grafic and I don't want to make this fic M so all I'll say is that it was sexy and Takada was using mop but was naked (you'll have to figure out how for your self rofl!)""

- Light and Dark The Adventures of Dark Yagami

" When I was a senior in high school we had to make a video and had to have blood packs. The best blood packs are made from condoms.

 We had the following on the checkout counter: 1 Box of Trojan Magnum condoms, 2 Bottles of Corn oil, 4 Bottles of red food color, two Super 8 video cassettes and one roll of duct tape.

 I have never before gotten weirder looks."

""I should warn you before you begin that you will need a tire pump equipped with a basketball pumping needle, as well as an electric fan and a piece of old bed sheet. Now, if you are still with me we can begin.""

- Recipe for Peking Duck from The Frugal Gourmet by Jeff Smith

""647. Any answer to a question involving the words 'wizard', 'station wagon' and 'wood paneling' is no.""

- Things Mr. Welch Is No Longer Allowed to Do In An RPG

"Teen boy to group of friends: So okay, all we need to take with us is some glue, feathers, some petrol, and a lighter.

Friend: Cool."

- Overheard Everywhere

"Homer: We need to get the plant running, using only this. (dumps out the lost and found bin)

(The next morning, Homer is shouting orders to delivery trucks...)

Lard Lad Branch Manager: How did you do that?

Homer: It doesn't matter, only that it worked."

- The Simpsons comic book, Dollars to Donuts.

""Have killed many people, many ways, guns, knives, drugs, tech attacks, once with farming equipment but never with medicine!""

- Mordin Solus, Mass Effect 2]

"Kenan: "Kel, grab a clown, a flagpole, and a submarine, and meet me in my room! Come on, Buffalo Bottoms!"

Kel: "Kenan, how am I gonna carry all of that stuff? Well, I guess I could put the clown and the flagpole inside the submarine, but it still SEEMS RATHER DIFFICULT! Aww, here it goes!""

- Kenan and Kel

"I'm going to need a SWAT team ready to mobilise, street-level maps covering all of Florida, a pot of coffee, twelve Jammie Dodgers and a fez."

- The Doctor, Doctor Who, "The Impossible Astronaut"

""Doll with bad haircut, bottle of wine, orange sunglasses, spray cleaner, pineapple, keyboard, balloon. I'm ready to make a music video.""

- Andrew Huang

"[after watching a sexy movie] "I don't like getting you worked up like that. We can't actually do any of those things...You'd lose your soul and besides, I don't even own a kimono!""

- Buffy, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Enemies"

""...bring beef, tequila and condoms."

-- From an official advisor's email to Sarah Palin"

- Wasn't Palin in favor of abstinence-only sex ed?