Guys and Dolls/Funny

"Sarah: You who drink too much, you who gamble at cards and dice and horse racing. Let us help you not to lose your money in gambling dens and bookie joints.
 * Crowning Moment of Funny:
 * "These dice ain't got no spots on them--they're blank!" "I had the spots removed for good luck, but I remember where the spots formerly were."
 * "I'm REALLY sorry."
 * "I will add nothin' to what Sky said, except to say that there are many here, upon who, if they get outta line, I would squeal with pleasure."
 * "Adelaide's Lament" is an example of Crowning Music of Funny.
 * The following sequence:

Benny Southstreet: This doll has captured my attention.

Sarah: Let us give you the strength to stop your drinking, to stop your gambling!

Benny Southstreet: She has lost me."

"Sarah: This may not be a church, but it is a mission! How dare you blaspheme!
 * And later:

Sky: How dare you misquote the Bible!"

"Nathan: Of course we'll get married, sooner or later.
 * Adelaide and Nathan discussing their relationship, and the lies Adelaide's been telling her mother about it:

Adelaide: Nathan, after fourteen years it's already too late to be 'sooner', and if it gets much later, soon it'll be too late to even be 'later'. Besides, I don't know what to do anymore about Mother.

Nathan: Mother? What about your mother?

Adelaide: There is something I haven't told you ... but my mother, back in Rhode Island, she thinks that we're ... that we're already married.

Nathan: How could she think such a thing?

Adelaide: Maybe because I wrote to her that we were already married.

Nathan: That would make her think so.

Adelaide: Well, in Rhode Island, people do not stay engaged for fourteen years, they get married!

Nathan: So how come it's such a small state?

Adelaide: Futhermore, after about two years ... after about two years, we -

Nathan: We got a divorce?

Adelaide: We had a baby.

Nathan: You wrote your mother we had a baby?

Adelaide: Well, I had to, Nathan. Mother kept after me and after me and finally I just ran out of excuses.

Nathan: What type of baby was it?

Adelaide: It was a boy. I named it after you, Nathan.

Nathan: Thank you.

Adelaide: You're welcome.

Nathan: So tell me, what has Nathan Junior been up to all these years?

Adelaide: Well, right now he's in boarding school. As a matter of fact, I wrote Mother that he won the football game last Saturday.

Nathan: Wish I'd had a bet on it.

Adelaide: But Nathan ... That isn't all.

Nathan: You're not going to say we also have an Adelaide Junior?

Adelaide: ... All these years, Nathan. Mother believes in big families, and, and we had such an early start.

Nathan: Just give me the grand total.

Adelaide: ... Five.

Nathan: Adelaide! How could you do this to a nice old broad like your mother?!"

"Nathan: And things being how they are, the back of the police station is out!"
 * Nathan and his buddies are listing possible places to hold the craps game: