Best in Show/Funny

"Stefan Vanderhoof: [discussing the calendar] We're not gonna sell, just give it out to friends.
 * Parker Posey's character freaking out over losing a dog toy named "Busy Bee".
 * The scene where Christopher Guest's character lists all the different types of nuts: "Peanut, cashew nut, pine nut, pistachio nut, red pistachio nut, all-natural white pistachio nut..."
 * Stefan and Scott's Shih Tzu Calender.

Scott Donlan: I think we should try to sell it.

Stefan Vanderhoof: Really?

Scott Donlan: Yeah.

Stefan Vanderhoof: Well, if we could give the money to Shih Tzu rescue.

Scott Donlan: They have plenty of money.

Stefan Vanderhoof: Well so do we.

Scott Donlan: What Shih Tzus need rescuing anyway? You don't see Shih Tzus straggling around the streets in an old coat "help, alms for the poor".

Stefan Vanderhoof: Like the little match girl."

"They all jump."
 * Announcer Buck Laughlin: "To think in some countries, these animals are eaten!"
 * Larry Miller's character describing the gory details of his job as a hostage negotiator during dinner.