Secondhand Lions/YMMV

"Hub: I'm Hub McCann. I've fought in two World Wars and countless smaller ones on three continents. I led thousands of men into battle with everything from horses and swords to artillery and tanks. I've seen the headwaters of the Nile, and tribes of natives no white man had ever seen before. I've won and lost a dozen fortunes, KILLED MANY MEN and loved only one woman with a passion a FLEA like you could never begin to understand. That's who I am. NOW, GO HOME, BOY!"
 * Crowning Moment of Awesome: "Defend yourself!"

"Hub: "I have held your life in my hands twice, and twice I have given it back to you. The third time, your life is mine.""
 * There's also

"Hub: Sometimes the things that may or may not be true are the things a man needs to believe in the most. That people are basically good; that honor, courage, and virtue mean everything; that power and money, money and power mean nothing; that good always triumphs over evil; and I want you to remember this, that love... true love never dies. You remember that, boy. You remember that. Doesn't matter if it's true or not. You see, a man should believe in those things, because those are the things worth believing in."
 * Crowning Moment of Funny: The final extravagant purchase by Hub and Garth.
 * Also the discovery that every single plant in their garden is corn, courtesy of a dishonest salesman.
 * For this troper, nothing beats the fight between Hub and the teenager with the knife. The teen comes in to stab Hub, who easily disarms him, telling him he's holding the knife wrong, correcting his form, then tossing the knife back to the teen, who then proceeds to attack again, using the exact motion Hub recommended to him. Though it still doesn't work.
 * During a farming montage, the uncles pass a tin of tobacco between the two of them. When Hub has dipped, he passes it to Walter. Cue Walter taking a dip and spitting it out on the ground, while Garth tells off Hub.
 * Garth's telling of the part where he helped Hub escape his chains. In his version, we see him fight off several men all while carrying about 100 pounds of gold. Walter questions how he could possibly do this, and Garth admits that "Hub might have helped a little." Cue the real version, where Hub breaks out and fights on his own, while Garth spends the fight trying to draw his gun and only succeeding after all the guards were taken care of.
 * Hub and Garth's will:
 * Crowning Moment of Heartwarming: Many, but especially this:


 * The end, The original ending takes it even further, and has
 * Further than that,  The director apparently decided the whole thing, including introducing Adult Walter's wife and sons, was too much for the last five minutes. Thank goodness for DVD extras.
 * "Yeah, they really lived."
 * Moral Event Horizon: Walter's mother crosses this when she decides to
 * She possibly crossed it even earlier, when she allowed Stan to take Walter out to the barn. She clearly knew what was going to happen, but let it happen anyway.
 * Tear Jerker: Pretty much the entire second half of the movie. They're happy tears though.