Light and Dark - The Adventures of Dark Yagami/Awesome


 * The author's notes.
 * It was the early morning and Light and Dark were in bed together but only because there parents were to poor to get separate rooms its not like their gay or anything! Light came all over the bed from the window of the room. Dark reached round and grabbed the cock from the table.
 * "I am your son Dark. The one you abandoned 19 years and sent to a boarding school in England."
 * L was in bed sexing! And the person he was sexing was….. Light!
 * Dark said in his shinigamiest voice "I AM THE NEW KING OF THE SHINIGAMI AND HAS THE EVEYTHING NOTE!"
 * Every time Watari speaks in 'British'.
 * Every time we're reminded that Dark is not gay.
 * Chapter 16.
 * Soichiro's F bombs.
 * The lame puns, especially the 'Near' jokes.
 * Anything Blud does.
 * Every time a Coitus Ensues.
 * The references to other works, as well as the Take That towards this site.
 * The author's attempts at writing dialogue in French.
 * When Dark becomes the King of Shinigami.
 * Anything the girl from the bus does.
 * "ENOUGH OF YOUR RUDDY FLASHBACKERY YOU SODDING ARSES!"
 * "I'M L AND I'M F-CKED UP WITH BEIN DEAD! MAKE ME HELFY AGEN OR I WILL SHOT YOU IN THE NOSE" he shouted at god who got all scared.'' Seriously, God is scared of L. How more awesome can you get?
 * Also known as: the CMOA to end all CMOAs.
 * Suddenly the queen got up and punched the dude IN THE FACE! Yeah. That Queen.
 * "then i will make a swap" said the creepy dude and he grabed Matt and tied him to a stick and got in his icecream truck and drove slow to the volcano. The icecream truck played the darth vader song as he went.¨
 * Being mostly pointless for the entire fic, Sachiko Light's Mom gets her moment of glory in chapter 41, defending her son with a laser canon made out of brownies that turns people into bunnies. Crazy Awesome does not begin to cover it.
 * Dark kills 1,000,000 stormtroopers with a gun that has a 100,000 round magazine. Not only is that probably the closest to Enuff Dakka anyone has ever gotten, that indicates that for each shot he fires, the bullet passes through 10 stormtroopers and kills them all. Oh, and he misses one shot, but punches another stormtrooper in the face so hard he flies back and kills another 100. Did we mention he's implied to have done all this in about 10 minutes, which would imply that he's firing about 166 rounds per second? In essence, this adds up to Dark firing a man-portable fully automatic gun with a magazine any Ork would envy at a rate faster than a minigun and more accuracy than practically any sniper while he's being attacked by stormtroopers. DAKKA.
 * Upon finding out that the secret death note was used by someone's dad Day Yagami simply declares every dad in the world to be under arrest. If the canon investigative team was half as efficient, the anime would be over much quicker.