Armoured Closet Gay/Quotes

"The louder and more frequent one's objections to homosexuality are, the more likely one is to be a homosexual."

- Haggard's Law

"Let me tell you a little story. It's about you. You are what we call a "late in life"-gay. You are going to stay in the closet, get married, get drunk to have relations with your wife, have a couple of kids -- maybe become a state senator or a deacon, and then get caught in the mens room, tapping your foot with some page. And you know what? I accept that about you."

- Santana, who knows a little something about this trope herself, Glee

"Henry: You have AIDS.

Roy: AIDS? The problem with you is that you are hung up on words. On labels, that you believe they mean what they seem to mean. AIDS, homosexual, gay, lesbian -- you think these are names that tell you who somebody sleeps with? They don't tell you that.

Henry: No?

Roy: No. Like all labels, they tell you one thing, and one thing only: Where does a individual so identified fit in in the food chain; In the pecking order? Not ideaology, or sexual taste, but something much simpler: clout. Not who I fuck, or who fucks me, but who will pick up the phone when I call. Who owes me favors. This is what a label refers to. Now, to someone who does not understand this, homosexual is what I am because I have sex with other men. But this is wrong. Homosexuals are not men who sleeps with other men. Homosexuals are men who, in fifteen years of trying can't get a pissant antidiscrimination bill through city counsil. Homosexuals are men who know nobody, and who nobody knows. Who have zero clout. Does this sound like me, Henry? [...] This is not sophistry, and it is not hopocrisy. This is reality. I have sex with men, but unlike nearly every other man of whom this is true, I take the guy I am screwing to the White House, and president Reagan smiles at us, and shakes his hand, Because what I am is defined entirely by who I am. Roy Cohn is not a homosexual. Roy Cohn is a heterosexual man... who fucks around with guys.

Henry: Okay Roy.

Roy: And what are my diagnosis?

Henry: ...you have AIDS.

Roy: No. Henry, no! AIDS is what homosexuals have. I have... liver cancer."

- Angels in America

"Larry: Harris! Sheesh. Next time, wear a bell.

Xander: Why so jumpy, Larry?

Larry: Geeks make me nervous.

Xander: Is that really it? Or is there something you're hiding?

Larry: I could hide my fist in your face.

Xander: I know your secret, big guy. I know what you've been doing at night.

Larry: You know, Harris, that nosey little nose of yours is going to get you into trouble someday...like today.

Xander: Hurting me isn't gonna make this go away. People are still gonna find out.

Larry: Alright. What do you want? Hush money? Is that what you're after?

Xander: I don't want anything! I just wanna help!

Larry: What, you think you have a cure?

Xander: No, it's just...I know what you're going through because I've been there. That's why I know you should talk about it.

Larry: Yeah, that's easy for *you* to say. I mean, you're nobody. I've got a reputation here.

Xander: Larry, please, before someone else gets hurt.

Larry: Look, if this gets out, it's over for me. I mean, forget about playing football. They'll run me outta this town. I mean, come on! How are people going to look at me after they find out I'm gay?!...Oh, wow. I said it. And it felt...okay. I'm gay. I am gay.

Xander: (thrown) I heard you the first time.

Larry: I can't believe it. It was almost easy. I never felt I could tell anyone. And then you, you of all people, you bring it outta me.

Xander: (awkwardly) It probably would have slipped out even if I wasn't here.

Larry: No, no, because knowing you went through the same thing made it easier for me to admit it.

Xander: The same thing...

Larry: It's ironic. I mean, all those times I beat the crap out of you, it musta been because I recognized something in you that I didn't want to believe about myself.

Xander: Larry, no, I am not...

Larry: Of course, of course not. Don't worry. I wouldn't do that to you. Your secret's safe with me. Wow."

- Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Phases"

""Dynamic Man said you couldn't throw a rock without hitting somebody in a mask and tights. 'And those are just the pansies in the German army,' he said, then added-- 'They'd probably run even faster if they weren't wearing those stiletto heels.' Curt was always saying things like that. He made a point of saying them. Which made some of us wonder if maybe it was D.M. who had something besides his costume hidden deep in his closet.""

- The Phantom Reporter, The Twelve

""ANOTHER sanctimonious Republican lawmaker who will undoubtedly one day be caught tap-tap-tapping in a men's room somewhere.""

- Towleroad.com, a comment on the article "Tennessee Lawmaker Warns Parents Not to Watch 'Modern Family' Because Children Might Discover Gays Exist"