Vampire Academy/Funny

"Rose: Hey Mason, wipe the drool off your face. If you’re going to think about me naked, do it on your own time.
 * From Vampire Academy:

Mason: This is my time, Hathaway. I’m leading today’s session.

Rose: Oh yeah? Huh. Well, I guess this is a good time to think about me naked, then."

"Mason: How do you not know where the heart is? Especially considering how many of them you've broken?
 * From Frostbite:

Rose: *glares*

Mason: Beilkov is a sick, evil man who should be thrown into a pit of rapid vipers for the great offense he committed against you this morning.

Rose: Thank you. Can vipers be rabid?

Mason: I don't see why not. Everything can be. I think. Canadian geese might be worse than vipers though.

Rose: Canadian geese are deadlier than vipers?

Mason: You ever tried to feed those little bastards? They're vicious. You get thrown to vipers, you die quickly. But the geese? That'll go on for days. More suffering.

Rose: Wow. I don't know whether I should be impressed or frightened that you've thought about all this."


 * In Vampire Academy: to this troper, probably due to the way it's delivered,
 * In Last Sacrifice, Abe
 * In Last Sacrifice, Sydney