Het Is Ew/WMG

Yaoi Fans and Yuri Fans are secretly working together...
To get rid of all the het fans and rule the world for themselves.
 * And then they will end up not breeding, thus causing all makers of romantic fanworks to die out in a few generations.
 * At least not the male Yaoi Fans or the female Yuri Fans. But they will respawn by knowl and opinion.
 * Most male Yaoi Fans are actually straight (they're just here for the story) and some female Yuri Fans are straight as well, so not exactly.
 * ... They're on to us... you know what to do now.

Het Is Ew is a natural reaction to overpopulation

 * It's simple: more breeders, more babies. More gay sex, fewer babies.
 * Uh...birth control? Sterilization? Abstinence? Granted, not everyone has access to BC or can choose abstinence, but heterosexual sex doesn't automatically lead to Babies Ever After.
 * Humanity Is Insane and/or Humans Are Morons. Why use birth control when becoming gay is so much easier?
 * Not only is the claim of homosexuality prevents overpopulation untrue, it's both self-righteous and arrogant. There are many factors that contribute to preventing overpopulation.

Het Is Ew is a result of massive faggots

 * Its all the secret agenda of the bundles of sticks?
 * What are you talking about?
 * Definition 1.

Het Is Ew is the result of too much fucked up animal queer cartoon porn

 * what. Most porn involving sexual organisms involves fucking of some sort, and animal pornography is by definition quite unusual, so you're wasting a few words there.