Modelland



""You want to be chosen. You know you do. Don't lie, dahling [sic]. You lust to go to Modelland to become one of the only famous people in the world...""

Modelland is the first in a planned trilogy of Young Adult novels written by former supermodel and America's Next Top Model host Tyra Banks. Notable in that it's one of the few celebrity book projects that (according to Word of God) doesn't have a ghost writer involved. It is a cross between The Hunger Games, Harry Potter, and America's Next Top Model.

Tookie De La Crème isn't what you would call a conventional beauty: Her forehead is big, her hair is ratty, her body is gawky, and her eyes are two different colors. So naturally, she didn't expect to be picked to attend Modelland, an exclusive school on top of the world mountain where the magical Intoxibellas, women who are a cross between a modern day supermodel and a sorcerer, are trained. It's an opportunity that every other girl in the world would kill for, and somehow, she and three other awkward looking girls have ended up there.


 * Acronym and Abbreviation Overload: Dear Lord, yes. It's rare to find a piece of setting-related terminology that isn't abbreviated in some cutesy manner.
 * Alpha Bitch: Zarpessa.
 * Aerith and Bob: Tookie, Myrracle (pronounced "miracle"), Theophilus Lovelaces, Zarpessa Zarionneax, Desperada, Abigail, Lizzie, Brian.
 * Author Tract: Tyra wants you to know that every girl is beautiful in her own way. There are also some bits about not sharing makeup, eating right, and not buying designer knockoffs.
 * Costume Porn: Because it's about fashion models, the outfit descriptions are very detailed.
 * Did Not Do the Research: The acting profession is completely unlike what Tyra claims it to be, as the liveblog has noted. Tyra claims that actresses are known for eating disorders, are only acting because they can't model, and that "[t]hey must think about sad times in their lives to project sadness in the silver screen," whatever that means.
 * It sounds like she was trying to describe Affective memory. According to that other wiki: "Affective memory requires actors to call on the memory of details from a situation similar (or more recently a situation with similar emotional import) to those of their characters." It's controversial, but still a pretty common approach, with many actors mentioning, for example, thinking back to unpleasant memories to try and work up tears for a crying scene. However right or wrong she is, it does seem like she at least tried.
 * Dystopia: One where supermodels have become living gods and everything revolves around the fashion and retail industries, no less.
 * Fantastic Racism: The staff of Modelland really don't like actresses. It's especially hilarious if you've ever watched Top Model, since Tyra frequently makes the girl go through acting challenges, and will mention how acting can be very important to a model, both helping with a modelling career, and giving a model opportunities once a model's very short shelf life is over.
 * Also, Tookie keep referring to a being that has a hand for a head as "it" even after she/he is revealed to be human. And the LeGizzards seem to be Always Chaotic Evil.
 * Fantasy Counterpart Culture: Gowdee'an is Spanish; Très Jolie is French; BayJingle is Chinese; Metopia is probably California, or maybe the whole western United States coast, since Shivera is a cold area; TerraBossaNova is Brazil; Chakra is India; Striptown is Las Vegas; Palinian is Alaska; Kwaito is probably an African country; FiveHundred is the southern United States; Canne Del Abra sounds like a stereotypical view of the Middle Eastern countries; NorDenSee seems to be Norway, Sweden, and Denmark rolled into one; Cappuccina is Italy; Pyramidian is Egyptian; TooLip is Holland; Icylann is so obviously Iceland, it's not even funny; MiniPaul might be Japan; Texiococo is Mexico; Oktooberfest is Germany; Didgeridoo is Australia; AngelCity might be Los Angeles; Bou-Big-Tique might be New York; Kremlingrad is Russia.
 * Eye Scream: Tookie's father impaled his eye on a sword during one of his shows when he was an acrobat.
 * Heroic Albino: Piper
 * Informed Deformity: Tookie, Dylan, Shiraz, and Piper have these according to the regular denizens of Modelland. Probably intentional, seeing as they're dealing with a magical version of the modeling industry.
 * Lemony Narrator: You better believe it, dahling. Though it stops after a few chapters.
 * Mismatched Eyes: Tookie (Green/Brown)
 * Parental Favoritism: Tookie's parents dote on her younger sister Myrracle so much that Tookie wears "hand-me-up" clothes from her sister.
 * Purple Prose: Tyra loves her thesaurus.
 * Self-Insert Fic: Tyra has mentioned numerous times that people in the modeling industry have been critical of her large forehead, her ratty hair, her gawky body. She also admitted that part of the plot was inspired by her own career as a model.
 * Serious Business: The entire world revolves around Intoxibellas and, in the case of girls, trying to become one. Tied into that is the collecting of SMIZEs, fake eyebrow-like artifacts (one of which is featured on the cover) that increase a girl's chances of being picked for Modelland by 91%.
 * Spork: Done here.
 * Theme Tune: Ms. Banks has made one for Modelland. Tweet proof here.
 * Write What You Know: Out in full effect here.
 * Write Who You Know