The Gulch Verse/Funny

""Officer Gulch! What are you doing?" exclaimed the shocked voice of Princess Azkadellia herself."
 * Trying to apologize to Az (and not quite sure what he's apologizing about) and unable to reach her by normal means, Gulch decides to climb a tree to her window. Unfortunately, the branch breaks before he makes it and he ends up dangling upside down by his ankle on another branch. Az opens the window and asks what he's doing. It leads to this exchange:

""Apologizing," he responded, "or at least that was the plan.""

""Apologizing? You know what for?" her voice seemed to be trying to bridge the gap between amusement and accusation."

"Wondering if he dare risk craning around to look at her he replied, "Not sure, I was hoping you'd tell me, but since I'm facing imminent death here I don't suppose it matters anymore.""


 * Any and all of his not-quite-curses. They are to hilarious.


 * The description of the problems of fighting someone attached to you.


 * Gulch's first meeting with DG. A five year old girl trying to copy a rodeo she saw by riding a very ill-tempered bull. What could possibly go wrong?


 * The drunken conversations. They are spread throughout the "Gulchverse" and always produce a chuckle. Lord Fonteroy is especially good at them. He even manages to scold Cain while he was completely drunk.


 * Doubling as a Crowning Moment of Awesome, the second duel. Lord Fonteroy, Too Stupid to Live personified of unknown skill, vs. Lord Fastidium, Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness personified who has been in a duel before. The winner?


 * The first duel was hilarious too. Gulch, who never swung a sword in his life, against Lord Fastidium. Not only does the cop have no idea of why he is actually in the duel, but he wins by using his secondary weapon,.


 * Any and all of Gulch's nicknames for Wyatt Cain. Especially:
 * Wyatt the-world-will-do-what-I-say-or-I-will-shoot-it Cain
 * Wyatt too-honourable-for-his-own-good Cain
 * Wyatt all-of-life's-answers-are-found-in-the-barrel-of-a-gun Cain
 * Wyatt Interrupting-Is-An-Offense-Punishable-By-Death Cain


 * Gulch and Fonteroy's habit of nicknaming led to one hilarious result: The Nicknaming War.


 * The Glitch and Ambrose chapters of "A Day in the Life of an Azkadillian Bodyguard." A large percentage of both chapters deals with the difficulties of dealing with the other personality and their particular traits (Glitch's inability to focus and glitching, Ambrose's less than ideal ability to be a "people person" and his continued phobia of Az).
 * This eventually leads to Ambrose thinking that having Gulch spend less time around Azkadillia would be beneficial and prevent further incidents where the cop accidentally makes her miserable. Glitch essentially thinks his other half is an idiot.