Pawn Stars/Funny

"Rick: (coming out to the parking lot) Dad?! What in the hell are you doing?!
 * Old Man driving around in a very small, 2-seater, three-wheeled electric car, while belting out Dull Surprise "wheeeee"'s the whole time.

Old Man: This is pretty fun. Wheeeee~"

"Old Man: (counting the money) God damn; this is a lot of fuckin' swearin'.""
 * When the Old Man wanted to drive the Shelby Cobra first on the race track. Everyone watched to see how fast he would go and he took off at a whopping... 30 miles per hour. He didn't even drive fast enough to mess up his hair.
 * Chumlee admonishing the wooden puppets that Old Man purchased earlier in the episode, as if they were actual employees and he was displeased with their poor performance.
 * The Swear Jar. That entire sequence is gold.

"Chumlee: Hey, I think I found a buyer for the vest!
 * Robosaurus. Chumlee and Corey watching it in action. The owner, Brooke, joked that it should go after Corey and Chum Lee's bikes. Hilarity Ensues.
 * And then there was the archery contest Rick, Corey and Chumlee had with a hybrid bow Rick bought. Chumlee went first, and his shot didn't even hit the target, sticking into the bare wall almost a foot and a half away. Then Corey takes his shot, which went even further away and higher up to boot. Rick admonishes his son for losing to Chumlee and then takes his shot...which ends up something like four feet away from the target and ends up in the bare wall. To top it all off, Chumlee had made a bet with the other guys, and he offers to waive the money they owe him if they sing for him. Rick and Corey are both extremely embarassed, but they still have enough dignity to refuse Chumlee's offer and pay him the bet.
 * Rick takes a bath on what he thought was an Indian vest, losing $1300 on it. Corey decides to make him Never Live It Down at the end of the episode, screwing with him this way and that.

(Chumlee put the vest on an Alvin marionette purchased earlier in the day.)

Old Man: (Face Palm)"

"Old Man: Hey, this is kind of neat. Mario's Tennis. Whoopee."
 * The Old Man. Playing a Virtual Boy.

"Chumlee: I feel like I'm tripping.
 * The demonstration of the Rickenbacker lap-steel guitar:

Rick: (dies laughing)"

"Old Man: (eating) These are some damn good wings, Chumlee.
 * Chumlee fixes up a not-working model RC car, getting it to run again (and winning $50 from Rick). He then takes the money and buys some chicken wings for him and the Old Man. At the end of the episode:

Chumlee: (eating) Yeah.

Old Man: Uh, oh...my heart just stopped...(punches himself in the chest a few times)

(Cut away to storefront)

Old Man: There we go."

"Old Man: I don't understand horror films. If you want horror, have a couple of kids."
 * Hilarity Ensues as the computers in the shop crash for most of the day. Hilarious in that:
 * a) Chumlee and Corey have no idea how to fill out forms manually (even asking the Old Man what SS No. meant ) and
 * b) Old Man taking to playing solitaire with an actual deck of cards instead of on his computer. Corey sneaks the Ace and ten of spades from the deck without Old Man noticing.
 * Old Man on horror films, when someone brings in old Freddy Kruger toys:

"Old Man: What the hell, give him the hundred bucks!"
 * The Halloween costume contest. Rick goes as Dr. Evil (which, sadly, flies over the heads of Old Man and Corey); Chumlee goes as Justin Bieber (which flies well over the head of Old Man, who can't even pronounce the name properly); Old Man goes as Rooster Cogburn (Rick guesses it's Roy Rogers); and Corey...just sticks a knife-through-your-head headband on and phones it in. The winner?

"Rick: For Halloween this year, everyone's gotta wear a costume. There is gonna be a prize.
 * The money is actually in store credit, causing both Corey and  to call them cheap upon hearing about it.

Chumlee: What's the prize?

Rick: Hundred dollars.

Chumlee: Sweet!

Rick: In store credit.

Corey: God, you're cheap.

(at the end of the episode)


 * Yeah, sweet, a hundred bucks.

Old Man: Hundred dollars worth of store credit,.


 * Cheapest bosses ever."

"Chumlee: How can Jimi Hendrix not be your style?
 * Finding a rare Jimi Hendrix portrait, with Corey intending to use it as a Father's Day gift. And the seller said it wasn't his "style":

Seller: He's just...not my style.

Chumlee and Corey: ..."

"Rick: ...really?"
 * Someone sells a loudspeaker from Ebbet's Field. Old Man uses it to bark announcements to the customers throughout the episode...until Rick disconnects the mic and takes it from him.
 * The end of Teacher's Pet. Chumlee has been teaching Antwaun about the pawn business, and after he makes a good buy Chumlee tells him it's time to clean up. He goes to get glass cleaner and a paper towel, turns around...and Antwaun is gone.
 * Chumlee and Corey arguing over whether RoboCop or The Terminator is stronger.
 * The Old Man expressing a personal interest in, of all things, an R2-D2 cooler. He mentions he considered him the best part of the original film and wouldn't mind keeping it for himself if he got it.
 * The can of rotted (thankfully sealed) elephant dung. The absurdity starts with the seller wanting ten thousand dollars for it. He ends up taking $20 for it, mostly because he was glad to be rid of it. It then gets turned into a Running Gag throughout the episode:
 * Chumlee wraps it up in gift wrap and gives it to Rick as a gift. It gets a chuckle out of everyone else.
 * Rick then stuffs it in a plastic bag, hands it to Corey while saying, "Here, I brought you lunch," to which Corey is not amused.
 * Old Man picks his hat up from his desk...and the can is underneath, staring at him.
 * Rick finds it in the display case, with some of the most expensive rings in the shop perched atop it.


 * When trying to figure out who broke a 200 year old vase in the warehouse, Rick brings up the surveillance tapes, and finds a clip of Chumlee wielding a replica of a Klingon Bat'leth and swinging it around like Star Wars Kid. Unsurprisingly, Chumlee's wild flailing knocks the vase over and breaks it. As punishment, Rick shows the tape to all of the store employees (and national television). The footage can be seen here.
 * Chumlee wanting to start a feud with Rick, and Rick agrees if Chumlee can finish a crossword puzzle before Rick. Chumlee does, but does so completely incorrectly, including putting multiple letters in boxes. Chumlee claims Rick never said it had to be done correctly, and The Old Man agrees, but Rick doesn't. So Chumlee declares a feud on each of the Harrisons.