Chuck Lorre Vanity Plates

Following are a small and incomplete sampling of the vanity plates that Chuck Lorre, co-creator and executive producer of Dharma & Greg appended to the credits of that program (and to his subsequent shows, like Two and A Half Men and The Big Bang Theory) and a short choir. "The Official Vanity Card Archives" are at ChuckLorre.com.

"Chuck's Vanity Card #1":

"Thank you for videotaping Dharma & Greg and freeze framing on my vanity card. I'd like to take this opportunity to share with you some of my beliefs. I believe that everyone thinks they can write. This is not true. It is true, however, that everyone can direct. I believe that beer is a gateway drug that leads, inevitably to vodka and somebody oughta do something about it. I believe that when ABC reads this, I'm gonna be in big trouble. Once again, thanks for watching Dharma & Greg. Please be sure to tune in again to the vanity card for more of my personal beliefs."

"Chuck's Vanity Card #3":

"I believe that El Nino is an international conspiracy perpetrated by evil roofing contractors. I believe that TV is the cause of all the violence and immorality our society -- ha! just kidding."

"Chuck's Vanity Card #5":

"I believe that this episode, which on the surface deals with a funny Valentine's adventure, in fact grapples with the weighty issue of Weltschmertz. Weltschmertz is a German word which loosely means "world suffering deriving from the inevitability of reality to never match up with our expectations." Hey, only the Germans could come up with a word like that.... Finally, I believe that when I retire and teach sitcom writing at a community college, I'll use this theme for one of my classes to impress the kids."

"Chuck's Vanity Card #6":

"For those of you who are new, this is my sporadic attempt to share my personal beliefs with millions of people (hence the term "vanity"). This attempt has led me into communicating many deep thoughts, and, I'm afraid to say, quite a few shallow ones as well. But what I've found most interesting is that after a few weeks, I've discovered myself scrounging for new beliefs. Things about which I could stand up and say with pride, "I believe in this, dammit!"... I do believe that JFK had a much better understanding of the word "perky.""