Command and Conquer Red Alert/Funny

"Yuriko Omega: This is a laundry list. Literally. What do they need with 2000 plaid skirts?"
 * From the Red Alert 3 Conscript. "Ever since I was little boy I wanted to torpedo dolphin with sub!"
 * Even funnier because that can literally happen.
 * In the Soviet campaign in Red Alert 3, the Russians launch an attack on the Allied headquarters in Geneva. Apparently the most logical plan is to teleport in a fleet.
 * The entire cinematic where the Emperor's son warns him about an impending treaty-breaking surprise attack on... Pearl Harbor. The Emperor immediately says the islands are filled with historical monuments and half the Japanese fleet is stationed there, there's no way the Allies would be dumb enough to try that. The scene's played completely seriously (since WWII never happened in this timeline) but the player will likely be laughing aloud.
 * Checking one of the terminals on the final level of the Yuriko mini-campaign in Uprising yields this gem:


 * Any scene with Romanov in Red Alert 2.