Everything's Better with Monkeys/Quotes

""What, you think 'Gorilla Grodd' came out of nowhere? You think Superman fought a giant ape or Jimmy Olsen became hirsute out of random chance? Hell no, boys and girls: It was canny marketing. Big monkeys get kids picking up funnybooks. Simple as that.""

- 'Peter David, in the forward to The Adventures of Barry Ween, Boy Genius, Volume 3: "Monkey Tales"

""Maybe it's just me, but I'm not crazy about super hero stories where everything's all dark and moody. Personally, I like the ones where good guys fight giant apes on the moon and stuff. Remember those?""

- 'Doreen Green, a.k.a. Squirrel Girl

""When in doubt, add monkeys!""

- The First Rule of Drama, attributed to Lee Unkrich

""All great movies have monkeys! Chairman of the Board had a monkey! No wait, that was Carrot Top, who I think is a monkey.""

- Chester A. Bum on Kung Fu Panda

""We have to see the chimp playing hockey. That's hilarious. The ice is so slippery, and-and monkeys are all irrational. We have to see this.""

- Anya, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

"Abe Sapien: Is that a monkey?"''

Hellboy: He's got a gun!"

- Box Full Of Evil

""Monkey!""

- Koopa, Super Mario Bros

""The funny thing is, Gorilla-Man appears on covers no matter how much he's involved in a story. We can tell cover artists "this focuses mainly on Namora," and there will still be a gorilla on that cover. Artists like drawing apes, and who am I to stop them?""

- Jeff Parker, comic book writer

"If I had a million dollars,

I'd buy you a monkey,

Haven't you always wanted a monkey?"

- Barenaked Ladies, "If I Had a Million Dollars"

""Monkeys make everything better!""

- Ned Bigby, Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide

"(Jeff is interviewing a monkey during a Terrible Interviewees Montage)

Jeff: I have always wanted a monkey!

(Donkey Kong falls onto the monkey.)

Jeff: I have always wanted a monkey wearing a tie!"

- Bowser's Kingdom episode 6

""Anything with monkeys in it? At least 12% better than anything without monkeys in it.""

- The Fold

""I have every faith in your reconciliatory navigational skills, Mr. Gibbs -- now where is that monkey, I want to shoot something!""

- Jack Sparrow to Joshamee Gibbs, Pirates of the Caribbean

""One of the best uses for a monkey, is to make everyone pay attention to the monkey""

- Karl Tagon

""He's got the monkeys! We love the monkeys!""

- "Prince Ali", Aladdin