Batman Beyond/Funny

"Bruce: What's going on there? Is that a baby?
 * One episode had Terry forced to babysit an electronic egg-baby for school. Over their radio, all Bruce hears is a baby crying, which leads to this exchange:

Terry: Uh-um...

Bruce: You brought a baby with you!?

Terry: It's not what you think, really.

Bruce: Terry. Is there something you need to tell me?"

"Son: This isn't my first time busting a vault.
 * Oh, God, that episode was my personal favorite. Just off the top of my head:

Ma: Well, it'd be your first time doing it right."


 * Ma is full of Hypocritical Humor in that episode, 1/2 Mood Whiplash, the other half pure hilarity. When rewatching it on The Hub, this troper got a kick out of when Ma, in full Mama Bear mode after witnessing her biggest Son being utterly thrashed by Terry, says "Nobody hurts my boys", then proceeds to break his back as she walks over him... in high heels.

"Ma: Let's get out of here before pointy-ears shows up again.

Batman: Too late.

Ma: This is getting old, Batman.

Batman: Look who's talking."

"Batman: I can set the Batmobile to scan for [the egg], can't I?

Bruce: Uh huh. Unless they've already made an omelet out of him.

Batman: Oh, hey!"

"Terry: What would she want with gems?

Bruce: Good question. But I have a feeling she's not making slippers.

Terry: Slippers? From rubies?

Bruce: Before your time."

"Bruce: Do you have to keep lugging that thing around with you?

Terry: I need the grade.

Bruce: Even real parents with real children find ways to get away for the night.

Terry: I tried leaving it with my mom, but she said she was too young to be a grandmother.

Bruce: What about your brother?

Terry: I tried that too. Then I caught him shooting rubber bands at it. ...hey, maybe you could--

Bruce: [gives him a flat look]

Terry: ...nevermind."

"Terry: I’ll have to take Family Studies... AGAIN! Have you ever taken Family Studies?"


 * The wonderful moment after Blade ditched Terry with the Eggbaby yet again: "I WANT A DIVORCE!"
 * Turns out Terry gets the best grade to boot, as the only "parent" in the class who provided entertainment and "intellectual stimulation" for his eggbaby in addition to meeting its basic needs. Seems babies like Badass dads.
 * This episode won an Emmy, and really, is anyone suprised?
 * While robbing a house, the son tries to raid the fridge, then Ma drags him away by the ear.
 * At the start of the episode, Terry mentions to Bruce in passing that he's failing Family Studies. After cutting the connection, Bruce just looks at his dog and asks him, "How does somebody fail Family Studies?"
 * Terry sticking out his tongue. Here

"Blade: Where are you two going? Private party?
 * This hilarious exchange from "Terry's Friend Dates a Robot", which might be borderline Getting Crap Past the Radar:

Howie: [is dragging Synthia the Robot into a room by the arm] Yeeah! [to himself] ...I'm going to jail!"

"Howie: Wrong thing to say?
 * From that same episode, when Howie is trying desperately to get the "cool kids" to come to his party, Terry has this line: "Calm down. Only politicians chase after people who don't like them."
 * As well as an obviously drunk dude at the end of the episode watching the synthoid and Batman duke it out: "This is totally awesome! Synthia’s a robot and Batman’s kickin’ her butt!"
 * "Just FRIENDS?!"

Batman: Is it ever a right thing to say?!"

"Bruce: It was part of a yacht club.
 * That scene is made so much better by the fact that Howie's doing okay until he says that line, causing Batman to immediately facepalm.
 * Not to mention when Terry investigates the boys' locker room to see if there's any evidence of Nelson's "accident" being foul play and Max walks in to do the same thing. The look on Terry's face is priceless. To top things off, after they find a hand print, the boys start walking in and Max hides in a locker, begging Terry to sneak her out. He instead leaves her there and says he'll tell the teacher she's gonna be late, which infuriates her. Terry's such a troll.
 * From another episode: "Big smoking hole. Could be a clue."
 * The Royal Flush Gang's first appearance was robbing a yacht. When Bruce explains to Terry that their crimes all revolve around cards, he asks how the yacht fits, in a pun so lame... it hurts.

Terry: Ouch."

"Terry: Nice dog.
 * In the pilot:

Bruce: Not really."

"Jokerz Gang Leader: Who do you think you're talking to, old man? We're the Jokerz!
 * Also in the pilot:

Bruce: Sure you are."

"Bruce: And don't even think about putting that on."
 * There's a moment when Max and Bruce are trying to find Terry and find his costume in a backpack. There follow's a short phone conversation and then by a long shot of Max looking at the costume and perfectly timed just when you begin to hope you're going to see Max-As-Batgirl, the phone rings again:

"Bruce: You hate me, don't you?"
 * Batman: The Musical!
 * Made all the better with Bruce's reaction.

"Terry: Come on, it's schway!
 * And then a play on the Future Slang:

Bruce: It's schwarbage."

"Terry: Lady, that's the sickest thing I've ever seen. You're creeping me out.
 * "A superstitious cowardly lot!" Tell me that doesn't dig itself into your brain and STAY there. Bonus for the fact that it's actually Kevin Conroy, the voice of Batman, portraying the actor-Batman.
 * Despite the darkness of the episode, I had to laugh when Bruce told Ra's Al Ghul that he hit like a girl.
 * That, and this exchange had me in stitches:

Bruce: You? She kissed me!"

"Bruce: Be careful, McGinnis. Once he's on a rant, he's unstoppable.
 * Mad Stan-- a great Casting Gag with Henry Rollins.

Terry: Thanks for telling me now."

"Paxton Powers: Bruce Wayne is my mentor! He's like a father to me!
 * After defeating Inque in "Disappearing Inque", Bruce actually cracks a joke. As Inque is washed down the drain by rainwater, he remarks in a perfect classic Batman deadpan, "Poor deluded [diluted] fool." Terry visibly double-takes just before the camera fades to black.
 * This exchange from "King's Ransom":

Commissioner Barbara Gordon: Except he doesn't glow in the dark.

Paxton: Hey! I resent that! Where's my lawyer? I'll sue!"

"Terry: How fast does this thing [the batmobile] go?
 * A tidbit from "The Call: Part II" when Superman, being controlled by an alien, starts chasing after Terry:

Bruce: Mach 3.

Terry: Is that faster than a speeding bullet?"

"Terry: An invisible boy in the girls’ shower… Why didn’t I think of that?
 * In "Revenant", when the girls were talking about being chased out of the bathroom by a supposed ghost, Terry has this little epiphany:

Dana: What?

Terry: Uh, nothing…"

"Terry: Lay off him, Nash.
 * Crossing over with Crowning Moment of Awesome, we have a small moment in "Golem" when Nelson was bullying Willy Watt and Terry interrupts.

Nelson: You think I'm afraid of you, McGinnis?

Terry and smirks] I dunno. Are you?"

"(Terry touches Bruce's computer console to open the entrance repeatedly)
 * Here's one from "Lost Soul" between Terry and Bruce when an insane AI spread its code throughout the city:

Bruce:The door's not working. I had to shut down the computer so that Vance's program couldn't get in. If you want out of the cave, you'd have to do it the old-fashioned way.

(Bruce points to a steel door and turning handle)

Terry:You're kidding, right?

Bruce:None of the Robins ever complained (smirks)"

"Terry: By the way, what's the creepy lady's power?
 * This bit from "Mind Games".

Tamara: I don't know, but they call her Bombshell.

Terry: Oh, that's encouraging."

"Bruce: You must have put up a good performance.
 * From the episode "Payback", Bruce asks what Terry said to get Payback so riled up against him...

Terry: [smug look] Who said anything about performing?

[Cut to annoyed look on Bruce's face]"

"Terry: [lying on the ground, injured and annoyed] For this I'm missing a date?!"
 * "Rats" was a pretty lousy episode, but there is one priceless moment during the No-Holds-Barred Beatdown Mad Stan serves up to Terry.

"Kobra Advisor: She's rude, she's sarcastic, and she has absolutely no respect.
 * A minor but delicious one in "Curse of the Kobra: Part II" after Terry, in camouflage, overhears Max's kidnappers:

Terry: Gotta be Max."

"Terry: Nice outfit.
 * Later, Terry busts in and saves Max, who glomps him but since he's got cracked ribs, he has to push her away because it hurts. He then takes a handful of seconds to check out her Stripperific outfit and this happens:

Max: Thanks. Next to your pal Xander, you seem almost normal.

Terry: (glances at the guy he just knocked out) What was he trying to do to you?

Max: Turn me into a dinosaur.

Terry: WHAT??"

"Bruce: Ah, to be young again. And gullible.
 * In the episode "Once Burned," young people are stupid. Terry hasn't learned from his past experiences with Melanie, and Terry's brother believes that they're going to do an instant replay of the sunset.

(Sour look on Terry's face)"