Kissing in a Tree

Alice and Bob are in the same class in their prep school. Alice has recently moved chairs to be closer to Bob- and Dana has figured it out.

While on break, Dana asks Alice, "You fancy Bob then?"

Alice denies it.

"Yes you do!", Dana replies, then goes into the following popular ditty.

"Alice and Bob, sitting in a tree

K-I-S-S-I-N-G,

First comes love

Second comes marriage

Then comes a baby in a baby carriage!"

(These days, many reverse two and three).

Rather common with the Toy Ship, but can occur elsewhere. Basically, it's Dana figuring out that Alice/Bob exists before Bob figures it out. If it occurs with adults, the dialogue is usually more "explicit".

Anime
"Happosai: Dont mind if I do, actually. Happy and Akane sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
 * Ranma ½: After Ranma makes a sarcastic remark about how Happosai should transfer into their school if he's so jealous of all the time Ryoga and Akane have been spending together to study, Happosai replies:

Ranma: Why, you! Ain't cha never heard of shame?!

Genma: Apparently, not."

Fanfic

 * In the Harry Potter Fanfic sporked here, an adult Sirius Black sings this verbatim about Lupin and his Relationship Sue.

Film

 * In It's Kind of a Funny Story, Humble does this to the two leads, after they come into the Arts room together. Point of reference: He's a senior and they're fifteen.
 * Ernest Goes to Jail: Chuck sings the tune (Ernest and Charlotte sitting in a tree) when claiming that Ernest(who is Nash wearing Ernest's clothes but not his hat)is in love.
 * Greg and Rowley's classmates do this to him in The Film of the Book of Diary of a Wimpy Kid... even though they're both boys.

Literature

 * In Stephen King's IT, a two rich kids recite the rhyme when they see Beverly and Richie together. Beverly flips them off.

Live Action Television

 * House, Wilson and a clinic patient are watching a baseball game in an exam room when it comes up that our favourite diagnostician may or not have a crush on Cameron. Cut to House exiting the room while Wilson and the clinic patient sing: "K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"
 * JD and Danny in Scrubs attempt a literal version of this on their first date, but lose balance and fall out.
 * In an episode of Married... with Children, Kelly tried to taunt Bud with this song, but she didn't know how to spell "Kissing".
 * Jaye and Erik in Wonderfalls engage in some of this before.
 * Carrie sings this song about Miranda and Steve at one point, though stops to correct herself that first comes baby, then comes love and marriage.
 * In the episode "Damaged" of Criminal Minds, JJ begins to sing it about . To Prentiss' shock, Reid is clueless to its meaning.
 * Warehouse 13 has one example without the singing. Pete rattles off the first two lines when he finds out that Artie has a crush on a doctor affiliated with the Warehouse. Claudia mentions Pete saying 'something about Artie and a baby carriage' when she contacts him for information while on a mission.
 * In one episode of the recent BBC Robin Hood, Robin and Marian are trapped up in a tree by the Sheriff of Nottingham's men. Much the Miller's Son runs to tell the rest of the Merry Men about it; he bursts into the hidehout and yells "Robin and Marian are stitting in a tree!" This troper has discussed that scene with several other fans, almost all of whom admit to thinking, "K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" at that point.

Manhwa

 * In Id, Grey does this to Id and Ilrina when she starts acting like a Clingy Jealous Girl. It doesn't go over well.

Newspaper Comics

 * In Calvin and Hobbes, Hobbes sings this when Calvin gets a valentine from Susie. Turns out the valentine was for Hobbes.

Radio Drama
"Alex & Liz: Connie and Mitch, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S—
 * The episode "Broken Window" of Adventures in Odyssey has a particularly humorous take on this, as two of the children tease Connie about her frustration over her boyfriend standing her up:

Connie: (annoyed) We were just going to talk!

Alex & Liz: Connie and Mitch, sitting in a tree, T-A-L-K-I-N—

Connie: (obviously exasperated) We're not in a tree.

Alex: Connie and Mitch, sitting in a booth—

Mr. Whittaker: And I think you'd better stop now.

Alex: We're just practicing our spelling. S-P-L-L…I mean, S-P-I-L…"

Theater

 * In In the Heights, in the song "Carnaval Del Barrio" in Act 2, Daniela asks Benny if he's "seen any horses, today", having heard that he and Nina "went for a roll in the hay". The whole cast then proceeds to sing said song. With harmonies. In a conga line.

Video Games

 * An easter egg in World of Warcraft does this to popular Shipping couple, Thrall and Jaina.
 * Left 4 Dead Rochelle an' the biker dude, sittin' in a tree. kay- eye- ess- ess- eye -n g!

Webcomics
"Cloud: These Cloud x Sandra shippers can get really annoying…"
 * Yuna from Sandra and Woo sings a slightly adjusted version of the song to embarrass her older brother Cloud after his girlfriend Sandra went home. Cloud's mother Ye Thuza immediately joins in by quoting an embarrassing line from a Cloud x Tifa fanfic.

Web Original

 * Parodied in The Onion: Starr Taunts Clinton With Humiliating 'Sittin' In A Tree' Song
 * The webcomic Cyanide and Happiness did a hilarious parody of this.

Western Animation
"Samantha and Milhouse sitting in a tree, about to lose their privacy. He-he-he!"
 * Bart Simpson does a sinister version in the episode "Bart's Friend Falls In Love":

"McQueen and Sally parked 'neath the tree, K-I-S-S...uh...I-N-T!"
 * Homer attempts it in another episode, but trails off after "then comes", muttering to himself "Dammit, I know this!"
 * Mater in Cars:

"Riley: What are you guys doing here?!
 * Tucker in Danny Phantom sings this when Danny and Valerie are paired up to take care of a baby flour sack. Valerie rudely interrupts him by shoving his own hat in his mouth. The two weren't on romantic terms then, but it's a nice foreshadowing.
 * In an episode of Tiny Toon Adventures, Montana Max has to deal with people singing this when he somehow gets suckered in to going on a date with Elmyra. The mockers include both their classmates who see them at a fast food joint and later the characters in a movie they watch.
 * The Replacements:
 * The episode where Riley tries to find a girlfriend for Shelton starts with her receiving a fake love letter from Shelton, actually written by Sierra, who taunts her by singing this (with Abby even joining in). Later, when Riley decides "I know what I have to do," Todd actually imagines Riley and Shelton puckering up while sitting on a tree branch and fears she's going to do just that.
 * The series finale contains this exchange upon revealing Jacobo and Tasumi's Last-Minute Hookup:

Tasumi: We were up in your treehouse kissing and we heard a commotion--

Todd: Ooooooh! Jacobo and Tasumi sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I--

Tasumi: Yeah, that's what I just said!"


 * In the Rocko's Modern Life episode "Wallaby on Wheels", Heffer sings this after figuring out Rocko's affection for Shiela, but doesn't bother to spell "kissing".
 * The Codename: Kids Next Door episode introducing King Sandy has Wally suffer this from Hoagie and Abby when he says he has to save Kuki (which he claims is because "she owes me a quarter"). Surrrreee...
 * In the Kim Possible episode "Partners", Shego sings it to taunt Drakken about his crush on DNAmy.
 * Batman Beyond: The episode "Rats" has Terry's little brother saying this about Terry and Dana, but Terry interrupts it at the last minute, throwing one of his shoes at the door.