Gilligan's Island/Funny

"Gilligan: Operator, listen to me, listen to me! We're shipwrecked, you see, and we found this telephone line, and we tapped into it. And we're on a deserted island, and there's no telephone booth or even a phone!
 * Gilligan's dream that he's Lord Admiral Gilligan, fighting pirates (the other male castaways) on his ship in the wildest, wackiest swordfight in 1960s Live Action TV.
 * The castaways tap into a transcontinental telephone cable, and Gilligan reaches an operator who keeps asking him to deposit a dime.

Operator: Why do I get all the nuts? (disconnects the line)"

"Mrs. Howell: I wonder how they got those little tiny oysters to produce such large pearls?
 * Similarly, when they find a chest which they think is full of treasure, the Howell's open it up and discover cannon-balls, which they don't recognize, and postulate that they are black pearls.

Mr. Howell: (in an amazed voice) They must have used whips."