The Nostalgia Critic/Tear Jerker

Doug has said how much he loves tragic comedy. Judging by these examples, he's very good at it.


 * Extremely easy to miss, but when the Looney Tunes are hammering their anvil in, he starts off disagreeing when they say to believe in himself and they care about him. Now that's some good Foreshadowing.
 * In the scariest moments list, him being hopeful that he's finally going to face his fear of the banshee and stand up for himself, but ultimately failing.
 * His terrified expression when he recounts how many times you have to break up with someone before they turn into a psycho and start stalking you. (It's 3.)
 * The "Alas poor Tom and Jerry" speech. What old-school Tom and Jerry fan didn't feel like that when they were singing about being best friends?
 * He made a list filled with 11 of it. WARNING: You will laugh more than cry. (Also, he's right. How did we survive our childhoods with all that in the stuff we watched?)
 * In a much sillier version, his tribute to his beard in Mortal Kombat. It's the Sarah McLachlan song.
 * The way he says it is funny, but the thought of a mini-Critic retreating to his cupboard whenever he got scared and thinking he was the only one to do that is a depressing image.
 * The Top 11 Dumbest Superman Moments ended pretty darkly. He says that despite everything, the Superman movies make him smile, but soon he remembers what happened to the World Trade Center, Margot Kidder and Christopher Reeves. Then he looks utterly miserable and leaves with "I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I'm gonna go kill myself." Thanks for making us sad too, love.
 * In his review of Short Circuit II he stammers out a "shit" with real tears in his eyes when he sees Johnny Five trying to get up from his beatdown.
 * In the Top 11 Cereal Mascots, there's a look of both guilt and crushing realization after the "my Dad still has AIDS" line. The latter is understandable (if slightly depressing by itself), but from the Alaska review it sounds like he's also worried about still getting punished.
 * The Patton speech "that [he] personally wrote" after failing to recognize Optimus Prime's death as a Tear Jerker is really funny, but then you see he's been tearing up so much that his glasses are looking really misty.
 * That childhood picture of his parents tearing him apart. The Stepford Smiler "I had issues" makes it worse. It's either really funny or really sad. But who says it can't be both?
 * During their review of Superman IV, Linkara evidently finds Critic panicking and crying distressing.
 * Seeing as how he had to talk about Siskel's death and what happened to Ebert, the 2nd half of the tribute to the duo, while still having jokes scattered around, made more than a few people tear up.
 * "This is just like prom night all over again!" That must have been awful.
 * People who have bad experiences with a lot of throwing up (either stress-related or just illness) will know exactly how he feels when he's sobbing and coughing after his first puking in Junior.
 * He sounds truly scared when he thinks he's losing his joke-making ability. And later episodes explain why.
 * His suicide and the circumstances around it in Spoony's Captain America review was a bit distressing. How would you react if one of your friends casually revealed to the internet that he dressed you up in an humiliatingly objectifying outfit while he was raping you and is using the pictures for blackmail?
 * A fridge one at the end of Quest for Camelot. He says that Mary Poppins was his childhood idol. A Troubled Child would rather be "practically perfect in every way".
 * In their review of Troll IV, Snob and Phelous aren't all that happy to see him drunk and vulnerable. And these aren't the most empathetic of men so that means a lot.
 * His gigantic rant on how A Troll in Central Park is giving the bad message to rely on your hopes and dreams. Speaking from experience, are we Critic?
 * Over on Familiar Faces, his breaking down to CR about how insecure he is with his job, setting up the depression below.
 * The end of the "My Pet Monster" review was parodying the bizarre ending of the movie, but it was still effectively depressing in many ways:
 * That Thousand-Yard Stare when he remembers how he was pitied for acting like a monkey in eighth grade.
 * The call, how he just shrinks in more and more as it goes. The emotions on his face... Doug really is a great actor.
 * After he hangs up, how he just stares at his phone miserably for a few seconds, almost like he's been betrayed by it.
 * Sitting in his room alone. Made worse by the music he chose when he was sitting there. "The Lonely Man". Aww Critic, honey...
 * And if you thought that was bad, the commercial special turns it Up to Eleven:
 * After the most likely intentional OTT-ness of the first breakdown ("I'm a wreck!" and such), the second breakdown just before his Moment of Awesome will very likely throw you for a loop. "There's nothing left for me anymore." He just sounds so lost and broken.
 * The adorable picture of eight year old Critic. The Dark and Troubled Past he's built up is slightly less funny when you have such a sweet face to attach it to.
 * The very near Death by Despair, slumping over his chair lifeless. If he hadn't managed to pull himself out of it, it's actually rather scary to imagine such a Hot-Blooded guy just kinda wasting away.
 * There's something quite unsettling about that shot before the camera goes back to him for his song. It's hard to explain, but it's like those movies where you think the person is just sleeping, but it turns out they died alone.
 * The instrumental he used for his Despair Event Horizon is called Sad Romance, and the full version might just be the most heartbreaking piece of music ever heard.
 * Say you were mid twenties or so. You're either recently been classed as disabled, you've lost your job or you just feel like your life is slipping you by. The episode will hit all the harder.
 * From Spooning With Spoony III in the donation drive, while funny too, his broken reaction when he realizes he's been raped by Spoony. Again.
 * From Care Bears II and the Book Ends of the It's a Wonderful Plot special, just how much Santa Christ now dislikes the Critic. It's deserved from his POV, but Critic really did fuck up completely by accident.
 * The Baby Geniuses review. Just seeing how broken that movie made him makes you feel bad that's it's also a Funny Moments.
 * Even the ending doesn't give that much relief. He's all excited about getting a second chance to do the Q&A, wanting people to realize that he's funny and creative, but when he gets there he can only swear at them again.
 * Staring sadly into the mirror in his review of the other animated Titanic movie. Quivering lip + Puppy Dog Eyes + the music that played after Gandalf's death = instant woobie.
 * In the Little Nemo review where he gets celebrated for not making a Finding Nemo joke, his squeeing that he's never felt so loved is pretty dreadful once the fridge sets in.
 * His top 11 list of Batman: The Animated Series was very like the show's dark tone. The majority of the episodes he picked were tragic, there weren't all that many jokes and he sums up abusive relationships in just one depressingly accurate line.
 * It's easy to miss, but in the Critic/Joe grudge match when he's losing, he looks like he's going to cry and says "okay" in a really defeated tone. He goes to a muggy angry face next time we see him, but you have to feel kinda bad for the guy.
 * In his review of Alaska, he remembers the last time he mouthed off to his dad and is actually shaking as he says it really was the last time. Funny and intriguing too obviously, but seriously, shaking.
 * In the beginning of James and the Giant Peach, his stunned, speechless, beaten-puppy expression when Chester yells at him.
 * His desperation to be liked again, especially as he doesn't get it.
 * That openly vulnerable expression when he asks the audience if he's restored anything in their eyes makes your soul ache.
 * Maybe not to the point of tears, but did anyone want to give him a hug when he was so delighted that another person (Lupa in this instance) actually listened to him for once, only to have a Yank the Dog's Chain?
 * Listen closely and you'll hear "Sad Romance" playing again.
 * It also shows you that he really does want to be a better person by how quickly he gets a whole new outlook just because he was listened to, it's just life keeps screwing him over.
 * Lupa herself becomes quite The Woobie when she accepts that the Critic doesn't want her help reviewing Simon Sez. It turns out she's faking because she likes him to suffer as much as anyone else, but it's still a bit moving.
 * His view of the robot from Doug's 1st Movie as The Woobie. "It's actually kind of hard to watch."
 * Despite the insanity of "El Tango De Pretense", look at him when he's walking down the street in the Moulin Rouge review and you'll clearly see that he's been crying.
 * Blink and you'll miss it, but the Chick visibly flinches when they hit Spoony's house.
 * Brental Floss' pitiful "Ho-hoooo..." after he's shot by the Critic toward the end. Not exactly tearjerking (especially considering the humor that follows it), but still quite sad.
 * His reaction to Patch being fired in Santa Claus: The Movie, ending with a tearful "Fa la la la la, la la la la."
 * Anyone feel kinda depressed when Critic leaped up all excited to give Santa Christ a hug but never got it?
 * The most epic answering machine message. It starts off as deliciously hammy fun, but then it surprisingly turns much sadder and darker with.
 * All that Fridge Horror has got to count for something.
 * It's played for laughs, but his reaction to the pet he called Ballsack dying. He just sounds so destroyed. The next review even shows he gave it a decent headstone.
 * In the Patch Adams review, his horror at the idea that he'd just been mocking a real person who was molested as a kid, and murdered. Everything turns out fine when it turns out to be a shockingly tasteless piece of They Just Didn't Care, but it's another indication of how Doug could have a serious acting career if he wanted to.
 * The entire second half of the review is a combination of this and Crowning Moment of Heartwarming/Awesome.
 * Ponyo time and again tempts him into making a joke about, but thank God he never does. Seeing him struggling to keep his sadness in is no less touching. Even a messed-up nerd like him feels sad for
 * Played for laughs, but in Thomas and the Magic Railroad he really seems broken at the idea that he's Alec Baldwin's delusion. One must wonder how badly he'd take finding the fourth wall and realizing he really is just fictional.
 * A bit more muted, but yet another one in “fuck-ups part three”. At the start he obviously just wants the list of his flaws over and done with (even finishing Douchey's sentences for him), and at the end he has a screaming breakdown about everyone being awful. It's so bad that Douchey has a My God, What Have I Done? moment and decides to leave him alone.
 * The bitter way he says “maybe I should be my own troll”. A cute nod to Doug playing both Critic and Douchey, but also pretty true in-character as well. When Douchey praises him for being good at coming up with insults for himself, you know damn well the reason why.
 * He looks pretty disappointed when Douchey realizes they've been bonding and forces it to stop.
 * In Jungle 2 Jungle, the addition of the Schindler's List theme gives the death of Martin Short 's fish an emotional gravity the movie hasn't worked for or deserve.
 * Nostalgia Prime's depression over how far his franchise has fallen since the days of the cartoon.
 * It was Played for Laughs, but there's something quite sad about his bitterness that women always leave him right after sex on one night stands.
 * In "The Top 11 Simpsons Episodes", right after setting us up with Bart's tears over failing again, admitting he did badly in school and that all the talks about if there was something wrong/feelings of failure really hit close to home for him. Suddenly all those "God, Critic, you are such a dumbass" moments have a painful edge to them.