Gaia Online/WMG

Most of zOMG is a themepark built by Johnny K. Gambino.
With the possible exception of Barton Town and the Village Greens, there are far too many problems with zOMG for it to be the "real" world of Gaia.
 * Everything is too small. Bill's "Ranch" is only big enough to sustain a family farm. Bassken "Lake" is smaller than some ponds.
 * A deciduous forest (Bassken Lake) and a tropical forest (Otami Ruins, Old Aqueduct) could never be that close together in nature.
 * Judging from the foliage in Zen Gardens, it's simultaneously Spring and Fall. The lower half is full of blossoming cherry trees, while the upper half is full of orange-leaved maple trees. There's even an area in the middle where you see both on the same screen. The simplest explanation is that the trees are artificial.
 * Deadman's Pass doesn't go anywhere. The whole purpose of a pass is to go somewhere. Otherwise, it's not a pass.
 * Well, there is that mansion on the hill...
 * It doesn't match up with the other map of Gaia. Otami Ruins is located where the Durem Caves should be. The zurg portal is completely wrong - it's flat and lays on the ground, whereas the 'real' one is an upstanding ring. The Old Aqueduct is located where the Great Wall of Gambino should be. (And an aqueduct isn't a wall by any stretch.)
 * Now don't quote me on this, but I think Lanzer confirmed that zOMG's map was supposed to be an extention of Gaia's original map. And considering that the old one is now just there for looks, people go along with it. On top of this, all of these areas are merely near Barton; because zOMG! is an extension of the Gaia map, that means there's more to this world than simply the four towns and the paths between them.

Ruby is actually Rosalie.
Curly blonde hair, blue eyes, a penchant for slightly old-fashioned dresses and hair accessories/hats, names beginning with R, and both tend to be seen with a cute young son somewhere in tow. Coincidence? I think not.
 * So does this mean Ian and Peyo are the same person?
 * No, just that Rosalie is a whore.
 * It quite relates with the fact that Johnny took the place where an amnesiac Ian thought his family worked for generations to give to her. And she's probably a vampire, too. It would make all the Gino x Peyo shotacon fan squee with the fact it would turn out to an incest case.
 * Oh, silly fanperson... Gino isn't shotacon! (Besides, they're too busy pairing him with Ian/Liam/that guy from the casino/his dad...
 * No, but pairing anyone with Peyo would certainly be shotacon.
 * Not if he's a robot!
 * Counter-Theory: Ruby is the Twins' mother. She dresses racy enough for the part, and until they were retconned into being vampires, the girls had blue eyes like hers. In addition, the pre-redesign Twins look a little like Peyo in terms of face structure.


 * Ruby and Rosalie are twins: it would make sense since they look WAY too similar for it to be a coincidence, and since twins run in the family (the ones I know anyway) that would explain AC and Marie being blue eyed blondes. However that would also mean that they are not only half sisters to Ian and Louie but also their cousins.

Timmy is the Perfect Labtech clone
Or rather, Labtech 101's enginereed clone, to not suffer drawbacks from weird lab accidents like him. 101's reaction to the serum was amusing, and eerily alike to Timmy's personality (and before that, he was already sort like this). Also, nobody mentions who was that section's Boss, only that she was female, specialized in Genetics, and had a special, almost maternal (although sometimes, looking like romantic) fondness for 101. Doctor Singh is female, specialized in Genetics, and has a purely maternal fondness for the oh-so-similar Timmy, that perhaps mantained the memories, personality (or even the soul), and Timmy himself loves her as a woman. Can anyone see a pattern? Conclusion: Singh is Boss, Timmy is 101's clone, because she knew the Grombie Reaction had a huge chance to happen, but liked 101 so much that she managed to build Timmy as his replica, or even, to a really weird extent, their son. Also, 101's name never was revealed, who knows if he wasn't Timothy by himself, and Timmy is Timothy the Second?
 * One more hint! He doesn't remember his own age, and Singh doesn't seem so consistent about this, too! She must be hiding something!
 * Except Adult Timmy looks nothing like 101.
 * Who knows what the genetic engineering could have done to his physical appearance? As well as all the weird stuff Timmy went through as a kid, and the manner in which he "grew up"...

Peyo is a robot.
Peyo and Gino used to appear to be about the same age. While Gino's Plot-Relevant Age-Up did have other factors involved, he retained the appearance of a teenager even after he and his father were separated again. Peyo remains as little as ever. This could be ignored, except for the fact that Timmy, who also appears to be about the same age, is now going through puberty. While the other children in Gaia mature, Peyo has remained unchanged for more than four years now.

Clearly, Peyo is a robot. Ruby claims he's her son because 'bots are only legal in Aekea.
 * I'll challenge this. Gino and Timmy have both been subjected to genetic tampering, which by Gaia Online standards could easily explain their accelerated aging.
 * It's also been indicated that Gino was a teenager all along, his biological clock just needed a hard reset.
 * Rina, on the other hand, has apparently begun aging backwards. She seemed to be a (young-ish) teenager in '04 when I joined, and now she and the characters around her act more like she's a child. If Peyo's a robot, what does that make her?!
 * She's from Ork, obviously. Thus, being really, really old. Like, millenia old.
 * His new sprite after the remodeling of the shops seems older. Rina's, however, is the same.
 * Rina has a new sprite now, and she clearly looks older (but not as peppy, which may be a good thing).

Sasha is a recovering cancer patient.
Sasha's extraordinary thinness has been drawing fire from the fandom for some time, and her hair, streaks and flower included, are available from the shops as a wig. Obviously the thinness is from her chemotherapy, and she wore a wig to hide that the chemo had also destroyed her hair. Since she's begun "growing out" the streaks and abandoned the flower, it means she's recovered enough that the chemotherapy has stopped and her own hair is growing back.
 * Maybe it was from excessive tanning?... so excessive that she never stopped tanning even during chemo?

At least a good chunk of the staff are TV Tropers.
The fact that they deconstruct, play straight, avert, and subvert so many tropes at one time is kind of suspicious. Maybe they just like Deconstructing in general.
 * This troper support this. If I recall, they used Nightmare Fuel one time in a sentence.

Vladimir Von Helson faked his demise in '07.
Vlad's body vanished when he "died".

Vampires, as presented in Dracula and the Dungeons and Dragons Monster Manual can turn into mist, among other things-- and since we've seen various vampires (users in the '07 event and Zhivago in the manga) turn into bats, obviously Gaian vampires can shapeshift.

I can't believe I didn't think of this until now. So many users have refused to believe he was Killed Off for Real. He wasn't. He's still out there, plotting his revenge and blaming all his troubles on Gambino until the time is right for him to make his triumphant return, destroy Gambino, and take over the world of Gaia once and for all.

Zhivago sends out those Clutch/Purse Spies into Zen Gardens for a reason.
To counter the above WMG, Vladimir really DID die, but his former right-hand man is looking for a way to revive him, if only in spirit. Perhaps he has a golem waiting to store the soul in, or Zhivago's crazy enough to use his own body as a vessel. Either way, he seeks the power of eastern magic (and perhaps a mix of western magic, too) to revive Vladimir so he and Zhivago can take over Gaia.

Jack is far more powerful than he appears to be or shows.
For those who have read the "silly" and "serious" endings to Demonbusters, Jack strips both Overseer and Sentinel of their godhood and immortality. Remember that said gods are MUCH older than him, yet Jack calls them "kids" like he was some old-timer, despite his history clearing stating otherwise. It could be that he simply had a lot of power on Halloween, but the event ended... on November 6. Whether that November 6 is on Gaia time or real life time, who knows. But in either case, he is either holding back quite a bit of power so as to not scare his followers, or his powers really are only at maximum near Hallow's Eve, and then once mid-November and December rolls in, those powers go *poof*.

It was still a cop-out if you ask me.


 * I always figured his powers run on Clap Your Hands If You Believe. Belief and fandom attention to him is strongest around Halloween, so his powers are greatest at this time.
 * Recent plot developments have revealed that Jack was actually serving as the messenger for another, more powerful deity when Overseer and Sentinel's powers were revoked. He just made a big spectacle of doing it, because that's the kind of guy he is.

The "Bananaman" item represents Ray Comfort.
One of the Midsummer Swirl items was a man in a banana suit descriptively called "Bananaman." Now, young Earth creationist Ray Comfort has been known as the "Banana Man" since he released a video in which he claimed a banana was proof of intelligent design. (He used a modern banana for his demonstration, apparently unaware that it was the result of years of domestication and that the wild banana could never be taken as "designed" for human consumption.) Part of Bananaman's costume covers his eyes, preventing him from seeing anything. Ray Comfort's arguments against evolution are so stupid, he appears to be massively willfully ignorant (in other words, blind).
 * Except that the Bananaman item was a parody of an earlier item, "MANtis", which was the same man in a praying mantis costume. Did Ray Comfort have anything to do with praying mantises?
 * Well, he's a praying man T.I.S. (Praying Man of Terrific Ignorance and Stupidity)

During the Xmas '09 event, Santa ran away from...
Zhivago, AKA, The Sniper, who is still alive and waiting to take revenge on all of Gaia for the downfall of his master. Think about it: maybe Santa knows the whereabouts and plans of Zhivago and ran for it to warn Ian and Co. Alternatively, Labtech X and Zhivago have teamed up recently, and both want to know what Santa knows about the Elftech technology that saved him from the brink of death.
 * Spring and Summer events are suggesting that Zhivago has a new boss. Just something to keep in mind.

Santa, Jack, and Easter Bunny are hiding from 2012.
Just think about it. Jack is more or less a god, able to absorb other gods'â€”or at least demigods'â€”powers for his own, and is already powerful. He's about evenly matched with Santa. So, two of the three are effectively gods, and Easter Bunny is probably powerful in his own right, yet they're all utterly terrified, when they could probably beat any challengers.

How can this be? Because they aren't just gods. They're also holidays. How do holidays survive? People keep on celebrating them and taking part in them, and as the hidden trio represent holidays, they exist as long as people celebrate the holidays they represent. Simply getting rid of or outlawing the holidays wouldn't work, because as long as people celebrated them in their hearts, they would still have power. Getting rid of the holidays would require the eradication of everyone who can celebrate the holidays. Can anyone think of any popular, upcoming end-of-the-world theories? Especially theories that Gaia would love to play with? Yes, the next enemy is going to be an anthropomorphic 2012. Possibly teamed up with both X and Zhivago, and hell, throw in a resurrected Vlad while we're at it. Because the plots leading up to and including Easter, Halloween, and especially Christmas 2012 are going to be fucking awesome, and the more villains, the merrier.

Dr Singh is going to be slowly driven crazy with guilt as the Timmy Evolving Item evolves.
She's already squirming and commenting on each stage that it wasn't one of her proudest moments, so she clearly realizes she did wrong and is showing guilt. Since each stage will be showing Singh the consequences of her abuse all over again and she's powerless to stop it this time, she will feel a lot more guilty this time around, and it will eventually break her to the point where she's all but begging for a second chance. This will be the point when the Evolving Item plotline starts up again, perhaps with T-Bone involved (maybe she'll adopt him?) Or she might just brush the guilt off and carry on as usual, but that's not crazy enough for Wild Mass Guessing.
 * She seems rather content with Timmy being an evolving item and has shown no signs of regret. She is a rather looking out for number one type of gal. And she even treats her brother with the same type of disdain as she did for Timmy.

Gino is pregnant.

 * Jossed, if you're referring to "Overseer's Gift". Pretty sure it came up in Ask The Admin at some point, and it's also mentioned in the Love Charm RIG if you ask the doctor (though that loses you points with him). Also, it's been over a year since that 4koma came out, and the gestation period of a clam isn't that long; surely he'd have started showing by now.

Rina is really a transvestite.
Considering how "she" always was flat-chested, this may be much more plausible than you'd think thanks to estrogen treatments. Rina was at some point recognizably a boy, just one with a slight build. He underwent rigorous estrogen treatments because he always wished he was born a girl. After his body was pumped full of estrogen for a couple months, he started walking around in girl's clothing, undergarments and all. He looks so much like a girl now, nobody even suspects he might not be.

The Sandman's gender is neither female nor male (and the reasons for putting a lot of people to sleep at once).
Despite what the being's name implies, "The Sandman" is more like a title and its true form is a living sleeping dust storm. It takes the form of a woman to try and stop Jack from ruining its plans, knowing damn well that Jack can't help but fall for a pretty girl (usually). However, it doesn't work, and their battle between each other results in Jack pulling off Sandman's blindfold, the only thing that stops all the sand stored inside the fake body from gushing out and subsequently exploding.

Using the character's SDPlus doll for additional hints to this theory, the reason Sandman puts so many Gaians to sleep fits with the sinister half of the Sandman legend (specifically, of "Derr Sandmann") wherein using enough sleeping sand results in the eyes of that Gaian rolling out of their sockets. Sandman then puts them on whenever taking on a human form, partially because being able to see helps improve its aim as a human. However, since its very sand comes out of said sockets, the eyes don't last long and they simply corrode. This is also why the Sandman wears a blindfold: to (attempt to) keep the eyes it steals in the sockets, even if that means the sand will simply eat at them faster. So the Sandman puts Gaians to sleep en masse and take their eyes in the process for the sole reason of having lots and lots and lots of eyes to use. In one of the RIG's bad ends, the Sandman steals Jack's eyes during the scuffle, probably because the eyes of a being like Jack Frost last much longer against magic/corrosive sleeping sand than regular eyes.
 * If you go by the Sandman victory in the Love Charm II, apparently

Diedrich is not related to Gambino in any way except for being born out of his ashes.
So many assume that because Johnny's ashes were used to eventually birth Diedrich, they are therefore the same being. That is not so. Before the overdramatic funeral given by the staff, someone tampered with Johnny's ashes; it was probably a Labtech who thought the ashes belonged to a zombified coworker, and experimented with them a bit. He was able to figure out a way to create another Grunny through the ashes of someone who had the G-Virus in their veins, whether the virus was active or not. This Labtech would eventually defect to NeXuS and help mass-produce the Grunnies for those Grunny Subs, but anyways... while the man's ashes were tampered with, nothing really happened. It was only until said ashes were in the right conditions -sealed away from air, no light, little to no moisture- that a defective Grunny rose from the ashes. How is it defective? Because it clearly doesn't act like a regular Grunny (and it gave itself its own name)! Which leads to...

Johnny and Gino were given the G-Virus... sort of.
For Johnny, it partially explains his ability to survive ludicrous scenarios such as falling from a tower and fusing with his son; it is in-the-blood Plot Armor. The virus becomes more active during times of stress, such as facing imminent death. Consequentially, a tumor forms around his heart instead of forming a Grunny on his skull, so while Johnny may be "clean," the virus can kill him at any time should it wish. But because it's parasitic, it won't. It also partially contributed into his descent into madness around 2005. When Zhivago shot Johnny, he was shot in a place where the tumor was eradicated and could not either heal or save Johnny; whether this was by coincidence or because this was information given to him is not clear (although the last time he tried to snipe Johnny, it was also to the heart, so maybe...). This also contributes to the miracle that is Diedrich's odd birth.

As for Gino, it was given to him by his father, perhaps as a child, so that he may eventually inherit not just the family fortune and business but the family attitude of being insane. It did what he did not expect, though: Gino was completely immune to the virus and it died shortly upon entering his system. The fact that Gino later lost his family fortune and business while roadtripping with Sentinel and Overseer is also probably a coincidence.

(SPOILERS AHEAD) Labtech X is going to foil the plot to kill all the gods and divinely-blooded Gaians.
Nobody outside of zOMG! indicates knowledge that Labtech X is still alive, much less that he is. The only character in the mass-deicide plot who is (indirectly) in zOMG! and might know about this is Zhivago, who as of "Leash" is being forced to cooperate unwillingly with his boss's demands and thus unlikely to volunteer the info.

So, Labtech X is probably the safest divinely-blooded Gaian in the world, adventuring crews periodically crashing his laboratory for gold/loot/lulz notwithstanding.

Sooner or later, X will learn about Gambino's assassination, and come looking for revenge because he wanted to do it first. This will likely bring him into contact with a) Gino or Edmund, who can redirect him to b) Zhivago, who can redirect him to c), thus sparking a massive all-out war reconnecting Gaia's main plot with that of zOMG!.

In the final chapter of zOMG!, Labtech X will go back in time, wash up on the shore of the Isle De Nativ with Identity Amnesia, and become
Thus creating a Stable Time Loop.
 * That would be really cool, but it would also make Johnny . In theory, the structure of each "generation" would be less stable than the last; due to recursion, Johnny would be the infinitieth generation, and his composition would be so unstable that he would dematerialize before rising to power. This would in turn prevent his own existence entirely, since he would not have been around to create G Corp, and therefore would never have created...himself...I have a headache...