ICarly/Funny

Season 1
"Carly: Sam.. THAT'S TWENTY-SEVEN THOUSAND! * Sam falls off chair*"
 * iPilot:

"Sam: (while dancing with a group of other students to Miss Brigs playing the bagpipes) Who choreographed this?!"
 * iWant More Viewers: PEE ON CARL
 * Additionally, the cop who brings Spencer back to the apartment is named Carl.
 * iDream of Dance: Sam, during her dream:

"Sam: (holds up a large plastic fork) Hey look, it even comes with a giant fork!"
 * iSpy a Mean Teacher: Freddie's giant plastic piece of pie.

"Carly: We're in a very serious situation here, Freddie. This is no time to bust a move!"
 * Carly and Freddie are trapped in the teacher's closet.

"Mrs. Benson: "You won't get respect if your back's not erect!"."
 * iWill Date Freddie:

"Spencer: "What?-Lamp?-What?"
 * iPromise Not To Tell: Spencer's casual attempts to turn on his new lamp while speaking with Carly

"Carly: What's the temperature in here?
 * Not to mention when Carly and Spencer are both screaming "RAMPU!" at the lamp, Freddie comes in, sees what they're doing, looks at the camera, and sloooowly backs out...
 * iHatch Chicks: Sam and Cary hear one of the missing chicks in the drain, and they flip a light-switch. Buuut it turns out to be the garbage-disposal instead. The good news was the chick was in a pipe, not the garbage disposal, but Carly's scream made it hilarious.
 * Also this exchange...

Spencer: Seventy-two!

Carly: Turn the heat up to ninety!

Spencer: Ninety degrees?

Sam: No, ninety pickles! Yes ninety degrees!"

"Gibby: I'm all Gibby. And you know what that means?
 * iStakeOut: "WATCH ME SPANK YOUR DADDY!"
 * iWin A Date:

Carly: Tell her what it means Gibby!!!

Gibby: It means I like to dance! WITH MY SHIRT OFF!!"

Season 2
"Carly: "I have a date with Shane tonight!"
 * iSaw Him First:

Sam: "Obviously!"

Carly: What's that supposed to mean?"

Sam: "Why don't you ask your new helping bra!?"

Carly: (gasps) "That's it! I'm out of here!"

(Carly walks out, walks back in)

Carly: "This is my house."

(Sam walks out)

Carly: (defensively) "There's nothing wrong with a little help.""

"Sam: "Stop watching the Video Game Channel, you big bunch of losers; you're wasting your lives! Get a job, kiss a girl, do something!" (turns to reporter) "...No offense.""
 * Sam's hilarious tirade after being given a 526-dollar tip by an adult hired by Carly and Freddie in iOwe You. Admit it, watching a 15 year old girl crazily dancing on top of the counter, showing other customers her tip before stuffing her face with their fries, eating chili directly on the pot and sticking a plunger right onto her boss's face before dancing out of the door made you laugh out loud.
 * iStage An Intervention has one for Carly/Spencer and one for Sam.
 * Sam delivering a rant against the audience of the Video Game Channel.

"Carly: (hoses Spencer) "What about the labradoodle sculpture for that important doctor guy!?"
 * Carly confronting Spencer about his Pak-Rat addiction.

Spencer: "He's not picking it up 'til Sunday..!"

Carly: "Today is Sunday!" (hoses him again)

Spencer: "It is?"

Carly: "Yes! You have a problem; you're addicted to Pak-Rat!"

Spencer: "I am not!"

Carly: (hoses him again) "Admit it!"

Spencer: "No! I am not addicted to Pak-Rat!" (gets hosed again) "Would you stop squr-" (gets hosed again) "I'm addicted to Pak-Rat!"

Carly: "I know!" (hoses him again)"

"Spencer: Carly? Carls? Hey?
 * And at the very end of the episode:

Carly: (sleepy) Hmmmmmm?

Spencer: Did you play Pak-Rat all night?

Carly: Mm-hmm. It's so fun...

Spencer: Yeah...all right, kiddo. Go on up to bed.

Carly: Carry me... (he does) It's such a fun game...

Spencer: I know."

"Carly: "Thank you, Mitch."
 * Near the end of iChristmas:

Mitch: "Thank you."

Carly: "Why thank me?"

Mitch: "Because, if it weren't for you, I would have never gotten my wings." (the computer screen shifts down to show a plate of chicken wings)

Carly: "...Chicken wings?""

"Melanie: "Maybe Sam hates you."
 * In iTwins, this exchange.

Freddie: "You are Sam!"

Melanie: "Really? Would Sam do... this?"

(Melanie kisses Freddie)

Freddie: (distressed) "You swore we'd never do that again."

Melanie: "I didn't swear anything." (leans in again)

(Freddie flees)"

"Spencer: "So how was school today?"
 * In iFight Shelby Marx, Spencer suffers from short-term memory loss. As a result, he asks the same questions over and over, until Carly gets fed up with it.

Carly: "IT BLEW UP, OK?""

"Nevel: Ok, Freddie, I'm not scared of you.
 * Another one of his side effects is uncontrollable muscle spasms. He ends up flinging a full tub of popcorn out of Gibby's hands TWICE ("Not cool, man") and slapping Shelby Marx.
 * In iFight Shelby Marx, Freddie locks Nevel in the ring after the match.

Freddie: That's cool. Gibby! Lights!

(Gibby turns a spotlight on Carly)

Carly: Hello, Nevel.

Nevel: I'm not scared of you, either.

(Gibby turns a spotlight on Sam)

Sam: S'up, Nevel.

Nevel: Ok, you I'm scared of."

"Shelby: Hi, Nevel.
 * And when Shelby has a spolight fixed on her:

Nevel: Oh, dear."

"Carly: "Aww! His mother needs surgery..."
 * In iRocked the Vote, after Wade Collins explains that he needed the prize money for his mother, who is sick in the hospital.

Spencer: (deadpan) "...She's not gettin' it now"."

""I think someone broke your yo-yo."
 * And after Spencer gives back the yo-yo he was playing with, only with the two plastic sides broken off...

"I think you need to go downstairs.""

"Trudy: How about we move this party to the couch?
 * Kelly Cooper: Terrible Movie.
 * iPie: This exchange when Spencer is trying to get a pie recipe:

Spencer: The couch is broken...

Trudy: (suggestively) Then let's go break it some more."


 * Sam:(flatly) Oh my god, a bear ate Freddie (actually in a bear costume). Bad bear! (hits Freddie with an umbrella)
 * Freddie: Never do that again!
 * Sam: You're not the boss of me. (hits Freddie AGAIN with the umbrella)

Season 3
"Carly: Whoa! When did you get so strong?
 * iThink They Kissed: Freddy managed to pin Carly to the ground.

Freddy: Same time the voice got lower!"

Sam: Right about here (pats stomach), being dissolved by my stomach acid. "Spencer: "Come here, we need to talk."
 * iCook: Carly getting absolutely belted with a pillow so hard it split the cover.
 * Also, Spencer and Nug-Nug finally meeting in the Groovy Smoothie, complete with slow motion hug.
 * Carly: Where are the meatballs?
 * iSpeedDate: Spencer tries to give Carly The Talk.

Carly: (sits down) "What about?"

Spencer: "Well... OK. You're going to a dance tonight. You know... with a new guy."

Carly: "Mmm-hmmm."

Spencer: "So I just think it's time you and I had a little talk about...“"

Carly: (interrupts) "I'm not having this conversation."

Spencer: "Thank you so much!""

"Freddie: "Girls who are rude to me don't get a bag of bacon." (holds up bacon)
 * Also in iSpeedDate:

Sam: (really fast) "Whoa, Freddie, I never realized what a hot handsome hunk of boy you really are.""

"Marta: "You want me out of the picture so you can have Lewbert for yourself!"
 * In iFind Lewbert's Lost Love, Carly tries to tell Marta that perhaps it won't work between her and Lewbert. Marta knows exactly what's going on.

(beat)

Carly: "Lewbert for my... the... I'm fifteen!""

"Mrs. Benson: (About the flowers Carly brought over for Freddie) "I soaked them in bleach and pounded them with a mallet."
 * Don't forget the freak-out Lewbert had when he saw Marta, which is a CMOF funny of its own because its so far over the top especially with the dual flare guns...
 * iSaved Your Life: Everything Mrs. Benson says, included but not limited to:

Mrs. Benson: * leans over right next to Carly's ear* "It should have been you."

Also the overly long security code for Freddie's room"

"Carly: "And thanks for being gentle!""
 * iWas A Pageant Girl: The dress removal scene.

"Sam * after taking the dress* "I feel hot!"
 * Also:

Carly "I feel violated!""

"(Gibby smacks Freddie's coffee out of his hands)
 * iEnrage Gibby: Freddie trying to talk to Gibby.

Freddie: That was a chai latté!"

Gibby: "Yeah, well I'm gonna make you a die latté!

(Beat)

Gibby:(Unabashed of his Incredibly Lame Pun)Yeah. I said it.""

"Veronica: I just wish I could hold him one more time...
 * All of Spencer's subplot, where he takes advantage of his "death".

Spencer: You can!

Veronica: *Screams*"

"Carly: "I see some trees, some bushes... and oh, two squirrels wrestling."
 * The climax to the Spencer/Mrs. Gibson sub-plot in iFix A Popstar. Both of them start seeing relatives in them (Spencer sees Gibby, Mrs. Gibson sees Carly), they both freak out. And it's hilarious.
 * iBloop: When Drake Bell enters in character as Drake Parker.
 * iBelieve In Bigfoot: The squirrel "wrestling" scene.

Freddie: "Carly?"

Carly: "Mm-hmm?''

Freddie: "The squirrels are not wrestling."

Carly: (pauses) "Oh.""

"Spencer: "Hey, did you see those squirrels?"
 * Then later:

Carly: (very quickly) "Don't talk about it!""

"Spencer: (as fast as humanely possible) It is a fifteen kilowatt liquid propane generator with a nine hundred and ninety-three cc pro-guard thirty-five horsepower v-twin engine yeah I said all that."
 * iBeat The Heat: Oh, Spencer.

"Mrs. Benson: "When the temperature gets too high, the elderly will start to die!"
 * This exchange:

Spencer: "That is a creepy rhyme.""


 * Carly, realizing that there are way too many people in their apartment, loudly asks for just a few people to leave. As she opens the door, at least fifteen more people come running in the apartment.

Season 4
"Accountant: (deadpan) "Look down.""
 * iGot a Hot Room: Upon hearing his great-grandmother's watch was insured for $82,000, Spencer's pants drop by themselves, for no particular reason.

"Fireman: "Yeah. We know who you are.""
 * The Fire Chief's reaction to Spencer introducing himself

"Freddie: You got your room back.
 * Spencer telling Sam & Freddie to move out of his way as he runs upstairs when Carly screams her room's on fire, and then as they follow him up, he turns & runs back down the stairs, screaming at Sam & Freddie to move out his way, before sprinting across the apartment & running out of the door, closing it on Sam, Carly & Freddie before they can reach the door.
 * After Carly's room has been rebuilt

Gibby: Except for all your old photos and other personal items that can never be replaced.

Everyone: GIBBY!!!"

"Spencer: Stairs! Stairs! Stairs!"
 * iSam's Mom: Carly completely freaks out when being trapped in a very tiny room with Sam and her mom at the family therapist's office. Sam and her mom manage to have a touching reconciliation while Carly is crawling over the place, bleating like a goat!!
 * This gem, as well:

"Aspartamay: You have the breath of a dastardly goat with infected gums.
 * iGet Pranky: Spencer's pranking montage was just hilarious.
 * At one point, he wiggles his butt around in an elderly couple's face.
 * iStart a Fan War...pretty much any scene with Spencer and Aspartamay. Like this one:

Spencer: Your words have no bite. For they are spoken by a gutless thief. Sprung from a lineage of cowards and hog farmers!

(The crowd gasps in shock.)

Aspartamay: ...Okay, seriously dude, you take that back right now.

Spencer: No returns, man. I put it out there and it's staying out there!"

"Sam: Well at least you learned something.
 * Almost everything in iPity The Nevel that was supposed to be funny had me smiling, from the egg-shooter, to Moonlight Twi-Blood, to the "Drink From The Shoe" part.
 * The second scene of iOMG was amusing, too.

Carly: No we didn't.

Sam: Oh that's right, you learned nothing.

Carly: We wasted your time!"


 * The Old Spice parody. Complete with Gibby as The Man Your Man Could Smell Like!
 * iParty With Victorious: Spencer in Kenan Thompson's hot tub and Sikowitz from Victorious scaring the living crap out of him when he pops out from under the water yelling. Also a still in shock Spencer's incoherent speech afterwards.
 * Everything with Mona, Spencer's ex-girlfriend. Mona is still broken up over him shattering her heart...and her leg.
 * And she's not the only girlfriend Spencer's hit with his car ...
 * "Random Humiliation!"
 * After Freddie says he just realized something, Gibby says so did he and that there are no yellow foods. The others start naming yellow foods, which is funny enough. But then Gibby starts naming yellow foods. It's much funnier in context...
 * During the Leave It All To Me/Make It Shine mash-up, Kenan just bursts into the room & "sings" the "'Cause I'm telling you just I feel" line from Leave It All To Me & swiftly exits the way he came. What really makes it, however, is the dumbfounded looks on the iCarly crew's faces afterwards.

Season 6

 * in iApril Fools, the repeated running gag of characters being hit in the head with stop signs.

Tie-in Merchandise
"Freddie: Let's play an improv game. You start by saying one word, and we just keep going until it turns into a story. Sound fun?
 * The show's original soundtrack is worth a mention, since it also has tie-ins with several Season 1 episodes. The four main characters simulate being DJs throughout the disc, inserting intermissions between tracks. It seems all of them are in incredibly snarky moods (emphasis on the girls) while doing their dialogues.

Carly: Not really.

Sam: No.

Spencer: I'm tired.

Freddie: Come on. Okay, I'll start. Yesterday...

Carly: People...

Spencer: Gathered...

Sam: In...

Freddie: The...

Carly: Ocean...

Spencer: Which...

Sam: Made...

Freddie: Them...

Carly: Wet. (deadpan) Fun game.

Freddie: (sighs in defeat) I'll play the next song."

"Sam: Hey, check out what I bought today.

Carly: You went to Build-a-Bra without me?

Freddie: Can we talk about ANYTHING else?

Carly: Ooh! You got the glow-in-the-dark straps!

Sam: I know. Does Build-a-Bra rock or what?

Carly: So rocks.

Freddie: Oh-kay, next song!"

"Michelle: Yes, now I can finally finish building that robot!
 * Michelle Obama winning a bag of nuts and bolts.

Bodyguard: *whispers something in her ear*

Michelle: Oh, I wasn't supposed to mention the robot?"

General/Unsorted

 * In this video, Victoria Justice is driving around with the iCarly gang. Freddie mentions she's in Victorious, and then tells her that she looks a lot like Shelby Marx. She responds, "Yeah, I get that a lot."