Van Helsing/Funny

"Frankenstein's Monster: By exposing me, you have condemned me! ME AND ALL OF HUMANITY!!! (Gabriel and Anna simply close the door on him)
 * After Frankenstein's Monster was forced outside and into a horse carriage:

Carl: Is that a man?

Van Helsing: Seven men, parts of them actually."

"Velken: I would rather die than help you!
 * One of the brief conversations between Velken and Dracula:

Dracula: Oh, don't be boring. Everyone that says that dies."

"Dracula: Igor?
 * A good portion of the fight scene between Van Helsing and Mr. Hyde. Y'know, when it wasn't Nightmare Fuel.
 * Dracula and Igor after the werewolf returns and Igor starts attacking it with an electrified prong:

Igor: Yes, master?

Dracula: Why do you torment that thing so?

Igor: It's what I do."

"Van Helsing: You are taking us to Dracula.
 * After breaking into the castle:

Igor: No. I'm not.

(Van Helsing slams him against a wall, hard)

Igor: Yes. I am."

"Van Helsing: Give me one good reason not to kill you.
 * Before this, when the heroes see Igor passing by, you can hear him complaining about his master -- "Igor do this, Igor do that!"
 * Even better is the exchange immediately after Van Helsing grabs Igor.

Igor: Well...I...uh..."

"Carl: The air is THICK with envy around here..."
 * A drive-by hilarious quote--after Carl tests the nitroglycerin, you can hear one of the priests in the background indignantly shouting: "What in the name of Allah is wrong with you?!"

"Van Helsing: (rattling off the monster's features)...and he has three copper teeth.
 * Van Helsing ending his Sherlock Scan of what Frankenstein's Monster looks like with this exchange:

Anna: How do you know he has three copper teeth? (As Frankenstein's monster is coming up behind her)

Van Helsing: (quickly) Because he's standing right behind you MOVE!"

"Dracula: I give you... VAN HALEN!"
 * From the gag reel:


 * From the animated prologue; the amazing holy water super soaker.