Implausible Deniability/Quotes

Muhammad Saeed al-Sahhaf
""There are no American infidels in Baghdad. Never!""

- Iraqi Information Minister Muhammad Saeed al-Sahhaf, with American tanks clearly visible in the background

"--"

"Bush, Blair and Rumsfeld. They are the funny trio."

"--"

"Our initial assessment is that they will all die."

- On the Onset of the War

"--"

"The shock has backfired on them. They are shocked because of what they have seen. No one received them with roses. They were received with bombs, shoes and bullets. Now, the game has been exposed. Awe will backfire on them. This is the boa snake. We will extend it further and cut it the appropriate way."

"--"

"Coalition forces have not crossed the Tigris River and are not approaching Baghdad."

"--"

"It has been rumored that we have fired scud missiles into Kuwait. I am here now to tell you we do not have any scud missiles and I don't know why they were fired into Kuwait."

"--"

"Faltering forces of infidels cannot just enter a country of 26 million people and lay besiege to them! They are the ones who will find themselves under siege. Therefore, in reality whatever this miserable Rumsfeld has been saying, he was talking about his own forces. Now even the American command is under siege."

"--"

"We are not afraid of the Americans. Allah has condemned them. They are stupid. They are stupid— and they are condemned."

"--"

"I blame al-Jazeera - they are marketing for the Americans!"

- On Al-Jazeera reports on the Invasion of Iraq

"--"

"I speak better English than this villain Bush."

"--"

"I can say, and I am responsible for what I am saying, that they have started to commit suicide under the walls of Baghdad. We will encourage them to commit more suicides quickly."

"--"

"I triple guarantee you, there are no American soldiers in Baghdad."

- With American Tanks visible in the Background

"There are only two American tanks in the city."

- Later, in the same Press Conference

"They are sick in their minds. They say they brought 65 tanks into center of city. I say to you this talk is not true. This is part of their sick mind."

- Later, Same Day

"--"

"My feelings, as usual— we will slaughter them all."

"--"

"Our estimates are that none of them will come out alive unless they surrender to us quickly. They are completely surrounded now."

- Just before the Battle for Baghdad

"--"

"We have them surrounded in their tanks."

Other
Fred Randall: It wasn't me! Bill Overbeck: What do you mean, 'it wasn't you'? We're 35 million miles from the nearest person! "--Rocket Man"

""I didn't do it. Nobody saw me do it. You can't prove anything.""

- Bart Simpson

"Etna: Looks like I have to resort to the politician's golden rule: "If they can't prove it, deny, deny, deny.""

- Disgaea 2 Cursed Memories

"Mrs. Teasdale: I saw you leave with my own eyes!

Chicolini: Who you gonna believe, me or you own eyes?"

- Duck Soup

"Rob Brydon: It was a lie, and he lied even as he was telling us whether or not it was a lie."

- Would I Lie to You