The Muppet Christmas Carol/Funny

"Ebenezer Scrooge: How would the bookkeepers like to be suddenly...UNEMPLOYED?!
 * Beaker (likely) flipping Scrooge the bird after the "surplus population" line.
 * The book-keeping Rats who work for Scrooge. It's a little less funny when your realize that they're only doing it to keep their jobs...

Rats: [singing] HEAT WAVE! Oi! This is my island in the sun... Oi, oi!"

"Scrooge: And how does one celebrate Christmas ON THE UNEMPLOYMENT LINE?!?"
 * As well as this line when the bookkeeping Rats applaud Fred

""Light the lamp, not the rat, light the lamp nottherat!""
 * Most of the scenes with Gonzo and Rizzo tend to leave audiences roaring in laughter.

"Rizzo: "God bless my little broken body. AAAAAAAAAAAA- *thud* (glares at Gonzo, who was supposed to catch him)
 * Another one with Gonzo and Rizzo, with Rizzo about to jump off the top of a gate:

Gonzo: Missed.

Rizzo: Ugh... ooh, ooh, wait second--I forgot my jellybeans! (climbs through the fence he'd just fell from the top of)

Gonzo: ...you can fit under those bars?

Rizzo: Yeah...

Gonzo: You are such an idiot."

"Rizzo: Jelly bean? I had 'em in my pocket all along.
 * Right before that...

Gonzo: (groans)

Rizzo: What? (awkward pause...then he leans in and quickly kisses Gonzo's nose.)"

"Scrooge: You're a little absent-minded, Spirit.
 * Rizzo expresses concern that part of this film could be too scary for kids. Gonzo replies cheerily, "Nah, it's all right, this is culture!"
 * What can I say, I love puns:

Christmas Present: No, I'm a large absent-minded Spirit!"

"Scrooge: Yes. There's more gravy than of grave about you.
 * That comes directly from the Dickens story.
 * And I love that Statler and Waldorf, er, the Marleys are happy to heckle Dickens' writing itself.

Robert Marley: More gravy than of grave?

Jacob Marley: What a terrible pun. Where'd you get those jokes?

Robert Marley: Leave comedy to the bears, Ebenezer."

"Scrooge: Therefore I am about to raise your salary.
 * Scrooge visiting the Cratchits at the end and Miss Piggy's brilliant Double Take.

Emily/Miss Piggy: OOOHH! And I am about to raise you right off the pavement...pardon?"

"Gonzo: You know, that's wax.
 * When the Ghost Of Christmas Present takes Scrooge to his nephew Fred's house, Rizzo takes notice of a bowl of fruit and starts eating. Soon...

Rizzo: Oh, yeah... I wondered about the texture... (Starts spitting)"

"/Fezziwig/Fozzie: At this time, it's a tradition for me to make a little speech.
 * This hilarious Call Back when Scrooge and the Ghost of Christmas Past visit Fezziwig's annual Christmas ball.

Jacob Marley/Statler: And it's a tradition of ours to take a little nap!

Fezziwig/Fozzie: (As everyone laughs) Pay no attention to them! (takes out a paper) Here is the speech; "Thank you all, and Merry Christmas!"

Jacob/Statler: That was the speech?

Robert Marley/Waldorf: It was dumb!

Jacob/Statler: It was obvious!

Robert/Waldorf: It was pointless!

Jacob/Statler: It was...short.

Beat

Marleys: I loved it!"

"Rizzo: Gonzo speak to me! I mean uh... Mr. Dickens! Charlie! Are ya hurt? (Gonzo sits up)
 * Fezziwig is called Fozziewig in this adaptation.
 * Gonzo uses Rizzo to wipe the soot off a window, to which Rizzo says "Thank you for making me a part of this."
 * The part where Gonzo gets knocked off a carriage, and Rizzo's all concerned for him before he wakes up and continues his narration has this troper and her mother rolling every time we watch it.

Gonzo: To say that Scrooge was not startled would be untrue. Still, the moment had passed and the world was as it should be.

Rizzo: He ain't hurt. Didn't even break his concentration!

Gonzo: Hm?

Rizzo: Nuttin."

"Rizzo: (sighs) Rats don't understand these things.
 * During the Christmas past section, Gonzo and Rizzo are watching a lonely looking young Scrooge.

Gonzo: You were never a lonely child?

Rizzo: I had twelve hundred and seventy four brothers and sisters!

Gonzo: Geesh, rats don't understand these things."