Michael Cole/Funny

"Cole: And all due respect to my mentor, the legendary J.R., "Slobbernocker!" and "My God!" are passe. Because its a new era. It's the era of "Vintage!" and its the era of "Oh My"!. So forget "Boomer Sooner", Hook'em Horns!! Thank you very much!"
 * Cole's attempts at trolling Jim Ross during Old School night.
 * Made even funnier by JR's refusal to even acknowledge Michael Cole's presence.
 * After winning the Slammy for "And I quote" award of 2010, he prepared a speech but he was cut off before he could finish.
 * Michael Cole's Slammy Award acceptance speech complete with humping Jerry Lawler.

"Cole: Patented Kofi!
 * Michael Cole, in reference to Kofi Kingston's offense:

Matt Stryker: ...patented?

Cole: I already said "vintage.""

"Random Fan: You suck Michael Cole
 * During the opening match on one episode of NXT season 3 Cole found the match so horrible that he stopped his commentary and called his mother on the phone
 * Michael Cole getting so fed up with NXT he gongs them.
 * Instead of providing commentary for a match, Cole and Mathews ate popcorn and discuss the WWE film Knucklehead. They even invited Tony Chimel to join them with Mathews telling him to not read from their script
 * When he vomited on Jericho seen here at the 10th anniversary of Smack Down. It won him a Slammy for the "Oh My!" Moment of 2009.
 * Cole's return to NXT Season 4 during the Talent Show had him once again, trolling everyone in his path.

Cole: Yeah, and so does your city!"

"Jerry to Jack: That's the guy who just slapped the taste out your mouth. What to you think of him now?"
 * Michael Cole bashes R-Truth for forgetting what city he's in during his entrance at the 2/7/11 edition of Monday Night RAW.
 * Made even funnier when the fans chant "Milwaukee! Milwaukee!" at him and Cole jumps up to start chanting it with them. The crowd IMMEDIATELY stops. You know you're a Creator's Pet when you can instantly squash the crowd trolling a wrestler simply by AGREEING with them.
 * ... wait a minute. I've never been to live event, but can the crowd even hear the commentators?
 * Not usually but the Titantron cut to Cole happily jumping out of his seat to lead the chant. Once everyone saw it, they shut up.
 * Admit it, you laughed when you saw the box and Cole referred to it as the "Cole Mine".
 * The fact that it's basically a Shrine to Self with his Slammies and douchey Cole stickers all over everything inside helps, too.
 * And for a brief time, the British flag after he was knighted.
 * Michael's reaction to Jerry defeating Jack Swagger, meaning that Michael now had to face the King at Extreme Rules in a match of his choice! The expression on Michael's face can best be described as a perfect Oh Crap and he's pretty much in a mini Villainous Breakdown. This even funnier considering what a Smug Snake he was before that!
 * And after focusing his rage on Jack, Jerry informs him that he just blamed and slapped his tag-team partner in their match.

"Danielson: (clamping down on Cole's hand) You call yourself a man and you can't even escape a handshake?!
 * After Stone Cold became the referee in his and Jerry's match at Wrestlemania, he kept on dumping beer on Cole. This is part of the reason for the aforementioned Cole Mine.
 * Not that it helped.
 * It's his own fault for not putting a roof on it.
 * Cole has a Weaksauce Weakness, his inability to escape from handshakes, that has been taken advantage of by Daniel Bryan, Jerry Lawler, and the Rock. Usually a handshake is followed with a total Oh Crap expression when he realizes just how screwed he is, honestly should learn to stop accepting them.

Lawler: (pulls Cole's arm through the hole in the Cole Mine, slamming his face into the wall repeatedly)"

- The Rock: (clamping down on Cole's hand) Go Heat, bitch! (Rock Bottoms Cole)

"DEAD BIRD!! DEAD BIRD!! DEAD BIRD!!"
 * THIS. Thank you Jerry!
 * It's mean, but this troper burst out laughing on a recent episode of Smackdown. Cody Rhodes had passed out bags for people to put over their heads and when the camera focused on a kid taking his off, you hear Cole yell, "Put that bag back on, kid!"
 * After Edge spears the Eagle.


 * Jerry Lawler vs Michael Cole at Over The Limit. Only two words can describe it; Humiliation Conga.
 * Pretty much everything that happened to Cole during the 7/25/11 RAW. First, his reaction to JR's return. He flips out on Triple H and jumps up on the announce table to start yelling at him and JR, looking a lot like a small child throwing a tantrum. Then Triple H puts him in a match, and since Cole doesn't have his orange singlet with him, tells Cole that he's had some special gear picked out for him in the back. When Cole finally comes out, it's to "King of Kings"...wearing Triple H's briefs. Cole actually cranks the hilarity Up to Eleven by trying to imitate Triple H's entrance...even down to the water bottle and mist spray. Then, to round the Humiliation Conga off, he gets squashed by Zack Ryder.
 * On the 9/23 episode of Smack Down, the Uso Brothers were in a match with the tag team champions, Kofi Kingston and Evan Bourne. Everything is going fine until Bourne makes the hot tag. Suddenly, Cole and Josh Matthews begin taking all of Booker T's lines, much to the latter's chagrin. Might not sound funny, but just imagine Cole saying "Shucky Ducky!" and try not to laugh.
 * "With all due respect... anal bleeding."
 * Booker T responds with the mother of all Flat "What"s, while Jim Ross can be seen muttering something under his breath. Given the rumors about that particular line, it's fully possible that this was a genuine reaction of shock that this line even made it onto programming.