I, Robot (film)/Funny

"Farber: Mother-damn, she just shot at you with her eyes closed, Spoon!
 * "You are the dumbest smart person I have ever met in my life!"
 * "Ugh! You're the dumbest dumb person I have ever met!"
 * "Do you ever have a normal day?", "Yeah. Once. It was a Thursday."
 * And of course, this exchange towards the end:

Spooner: HEY! Did you just shoot at me with your eyes closed?!

Calvin: Well, it worked, didn't it?

Farber: Spoon, she is shit-hot, you gotta put in a good word for me--

Spooner: Stop cussin' and--

Farber: --and go home, I got you! *runs off*

[Spooner runs over to Calvin and grabs the gun from her]

Spooner: Aim and fire."

"Calvin: It was a left, by the way, back there. (points)
 * "ACHOO! Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit."
 * "Look, I understand you've experienced a loss but this relationship just can't work. I mean, you're a cat, I'm black, and I'm not gonna be hurt again."
 * "Hold my pie." "What?" "Hold it or wear it, sir!"
 * "You are experiencing a car accident." "THE HELL I AM!"
 * "USR: Shittin' on the little guy! ...that would be the fade out."
 * "You're saying cats did this to you?!" "How the hell would cats do this to me? Are you crazy?" "Why are we talking about cats?"
 * "...I don't know what 'blithely' means but I'm gonna go get some coffee. You want some coffee?"
 * "So what hospital are you going to? I'll meet you there and sign you and your buddy's cast."
 * Best of all: "Somehow 'I told you so' just doesn't quite say it."
 * Spooner and Calvin's entire argument in the car while chasing after Sonny--showcasing their Like an Old Married Couple relationship--particularly the last two lines:

Spooner: (shakes his head) You must know my ex-wife."


 * My sister, a former UPS employee, cheers every time Spooner tells the FedEx robot to bugger off.
 * "Sonny!" "Yes, Detective?" "Calvin's fine! Save me!"