Get Smart/Funny

TV Series
"The Chief: That agent is our only lead to their Number 1 man! The man in charge of KAOS’ data smuggling operation. Your man was Number 3. He would lead us to Number 2, and Number 2 would lead us to Number 1!
 * Max takes a lie pill when he wasn't supposed to in "The Groovy Guru" episode. He proceeds to get into a cab and says, among other things, that he would very much like a punch on the nose.
 * Two exchanges from "The Amazing Harry Hoo":

99: How long have we been following those agents now, Chief?

The Chief: Since Number 118.

Max: 118?! My gosh, Chief, that sounds like an awful waste of time to me! Why didn’t we just start off with Number 1?"

"Max: The position of all these KAOS agents can be explained. All except one.
 * A few minutes later, the Chief shows Max a map of the United States covered in pins representing identified KAOS agents. Max is confused by something:

The Chief: Which one is that?

Max: What's this guy doing up here in Manitoba?

(Max removes the pin through Manitoba. The map falls to the floor, pins scattering everywhere.)

The Chief: (exasperated) He was holding the map up!!"

"The Chief: I can't believe you'd use (the Cone of Silence) just to ask me for a raise of $100!
 * I might have the amounts wrong, but there's an episode where Max insists on using the cone of silence to ask for a raise of $100. The Chief is furious about this:

Max: Would you believe...$200?"


 * Max has just met Hymie and is on assignment with him at a fancy party, unaware that Hymie is a robot. Wanting to be inconspicuous, Max tells Hymie, "Do exactly what I do." Hymie proceeds to exactly mirror every single move Max makes, drawing the attention of everyone in the room.

2008 Movie
"Max: I think it's only fair to warn you, this facility is surrounded by a highly trained team of 130 Black Op Snipers.
 * From the movie:

Siegfried: I don't believe you.

Max: Would you believe two dozen Delta Force Commandos?

Siegfriend: No.

Max: How about Chuck Norris with a BB-gun?"


 * "Oh my God, you and 23? I am so sexually threatened right now!"